WHAT'S WORSE THAN A DOWNGRADE? "Miranda Kerr’s romance with Orlando Bloom is over, says an insider who adds that she has rebounded into the arms of her former flame, oil heir Brandon Davis."
Now that the sole question driving Hollywood "creativity" is what do the people (and their money) want, and now that the answer to that question is video games, what's your bet on what will be the next video game to hit the big screen?
We say a live-action version of our childhood obsession, The Legend of Zelda, can't be too far off in the distance, because people love both seeing monsters and seeing monsters killed—Orlando Bloom would make a fine Link. And how about giving Mike Tyson's career a boost with Punch-Out: The Movie? Jude Law could be Glass Joe and Zac Efron could be the Little Mac! Somebody get me in contact with Uwe Boll.
File this under: Not believable in the least. The National Enquirer is reporting that Ryan Reynolds has jealous tendencies and may be ruining his relationship with fiance Scarlett Johansson in the process.
He almost drove Scarlett away. Now that she is marrying him, she told him in no uncertain terms to quit being jealous — after all, he’s the one who is shattering many men’s dreams of getting sexy Scarlett down the aisle. But it drives him crazy when other guys flirt with her.
The 23-year-old Lost in Translation actress just finished working on a movie with hot actors Orlando Bloom and Ethan Hawke in New York City — and sources say Ryan, 31, was terrified she was going to fall for one of the hunks.
Normally we would excuse a man for being jealous of the likes of Orlando and Ethan, but Ryan Reynolds? Not acceptable. But let's look at the silver lining, shall we? Reynolds may soon be back on the market.
[Source]
• Obama's thoughts on the gays and the church and the Democrats and…just a whole lot of prevarication. [Queerty]
• Celebrity non-justice. [DListed]
• Dick in a cell. [EBG]
• More court dates than romantic dates makes Britney a crazy lady. [PS]
• Charity fashions! [INO]
• Dr Kevorkian movie. Killer. [ICYDK]
• Petra Nemcova at a charity event. Graceful. [HT]
• The 17-year-old virgin. [Yeeeah]
• "Benicio Del Toro or Wolf Man?" [CityRag]
Too much pirating booty has gone to this man's head.
…fashion photographer Damon Kidwell…and his ex-girlfriend, model Veronica Taylor, were inside the club when Bloom "grabbed [Taylor] inappropriately." We hear Bloom was acting up and followed the two outside — angering Kidwell. Bloom then got into Kidwell's car, uninvited. We're told "the only reason there wasn't a fight is because of the cameras."
[Source]
• Why do jocks make it so easy? [Jossip]
• In boring news: Usher's going to father a son. [DListed]
• Beard and beard. [INO]
• There's rumblings of an Eva Longoria sex tape. Our flaccidity is beyond compare! [HT]
• Jennifer Aniston and Orlando Bloom together in Mexico. Add tequila and you've got unfamiliar, angry intercourse. [Yeeeah]
• That CSI woman is jumping the shark in a major way! See you never again, whatever-your-name-is. [ICYDK]
• Witty, Brazilian street art: Making vandalism fun. [CityRag]
A few weeks ago, Page Six warned sashaying fashionistas everywhere that the tents canopying Bryant Park during New York Fashion Week would play host to fewer fabulous guests this year. While the news certainly came too late for flustered, coked-up event planners to pare champagne orders, it gave us an ample amount of time to fix a cheese plate, pour a glass of red and prepare to ogle the wreckage of the most poorly attended Fashion Week ever. That said, where is everyone?
Last night, everyone was at the GQ Men of the Year Awards in London. After the jump, many pictures of them wisely not caring about Fashion Week.
CONTINUED »
Unless you're playing Hitler, is a mustache really "getting into the part"?
More hirsute Bloom after the jump.
CONTINUED »
Hi, Johnny Depp, I can't wait for Sweeney Todd! Anyway, could you point me in the direction of that younger, lesser actor that you worked with in all those movies about the pirates? I need to tell him he's a copycat who's not pulling it off.
More flattering imitation after the jump.
CONTINUED »
• This is like when George dates the woman who looks like Jerry, except Keira really loves Orlando.
• This book's making Katie Holmes crazy, and it's not Dianetics. [ASL]
• Guys in girl pants is the old black. [HR]
• Rachael Ray making up for lost lives with some yumo chili burgers cooked in under 30 minutes. Seriously, sweet gesture. [Glitterati]
• What, people can't relate to a tarted up, vengeful assassin with a machine gun leg? [PopSugar]
• Don Imus likes black people, still has no love for "nappy headed hoes." [IDLYITW]
• DJ Lohan spinning "I Drink Alone," "Cocaine" and "One Bourbon, One Scotch and One Beer" for old times' sake. [PopSugar]
• Richie may be engaged. Still not engaging. [DListed]
• Jael from Top Model 8 has been exploited previously, giving her a leg up in the industry. [CityRag]
• Jessica Simpson in a movie about a talented, naive young woman who becomes a pawn for businessmen. Is this a documentary? [ASL]
• Katherine Heigl learning the hard way that sometimes the homophobes are more integral to the plot. [Jossip]
• No, that's not your nana, that's just an Olsen. [INO]
• They can't get married because Penelope Bloom would sound too much like a children's book heroine. [IDLYITW]
• Carrey goes in tongue first. Amateur! [TheBosh]
• People still get this excited when girls kiss? Don't you dudes have the Internet? Just google "girls+kiss" and it'll be like early Christmas you adult teenage boys. Geez. [Egotastic]
• Orlando Bloom behaving like a real pirate jackass. [Glitterati]
• This "Naked Sundays" story is really, really, really boring. [HT]
• Britney. Ohhhhhhh, Britney. [DListed]
• Hairstylist defending his work on Simpson as if it actually matters. [INO]
• On the steps following a bigoted rant. [NYT]
• Cameron Diaz got $3 million for six hours of work. I hope they don't hear about that in Darfur. YAY! [ICYDK]
In honor of the one-year anniversary of the world's first partial face transplant, Freaking News is having a contest in which nerds with free time can give Photoshop face transplants to famous faces. The whole thing's pretty weird, but even weirder is that, after a bad day and several drinks, I probably wouldn't immediately rule out the Paris/Jessica Frankenstein thing if it was hitting on me at closing time. I've got a feeling another crowd favorite is probably gonna be the cute-ass-pirate meld of Orlando Bloom and Johnny Depp. Do you think they're gross?
[Source]
Orlando Bloom was caught pissing on a rock while out surfing this weekend. No word as to why he didn't just pee in the ocean like a normal person. Or why one leg of his shorts is hiked so far up to perform his duty. Perhaps there's something I don't know about Orlando's anatomy.
[Source]
It's the end of the calendar year (whaaaaa?) and Google has released their 2006 Year-End Google Zeitgeist, which, as far as I can tell, is a compilation of Fun! Facts! About! Our! Search! Habits! Let me tell you, it's enthralling.
The Top Searches in 2006
1. bebo
2. myspace
3. world cup
4. metacafe
5. radioblog
6. wikipedia
7. video
8. rebelde
9. mininova
10. wikiGoogle News - Top Searches in 2006
1. paris hilton
2. orlando bloom
3. cancer
4. podcasting
5. hurricane katrina
6. bankruptcy
7. martina hingis
8. autism
9. 2006 nfl draft
10. celebrity big brother 2006
Paris Hilton beats Cancer! Wheee. Wait a minute, how the hell did Orlando Bloom get so far up on the list? That makes no sense to me.
Check out the page for more information, such as the fact that the most searched for definition was for "promiscuous." Thanks, Nelly Furtado and Timbaland, for making us all look like whores. There's also a Suri vs. Shiloh graph. The girls peak very differently, but Suri peaks higher. Somehow, I think that's the most inappropriate thing I've said in a while. Forgive me while I go wash out my brain.
[Source]
A.
B.
C.
D.
E.
F.
Without cheating (if you squint hard enough while looking at the full size pics, you can make out the answers) try to match the Netflix "Big Reveal" Holiday Program Celebrity Artwork with the celebrity:
1. Leonardo DiCaprio
2. Charlize Theron
3. Martin Scorsese and his Daughter
4. Peter Jackson
5. Orlando Bloom
6. Charlize Theron (again, yes, she made two)
[Source]
These photos aren't new (they're from some Elizabethtown-based photoshoot), but I just wanted to give you an idea of what these two look like together. You know, give you a chance to get comfortable with the coupling. Ha.
So, the rumors appear to be true: Orlando Bloom and Kirsten Dunst are makin' it. According to The Daily Mail, the two have been quietly seeing each other for about a month now, but had their Chateau Marmont Coming Out Party last weekend:
They became good friends on the set of the film, made in Kentucky, but at the time Kirsten, 24, denied any romance, saying: "If you're alluding to whether Orlando and I got together then that's a no. No."
But last week they were spotted all over each other in Los Angeles hotel Chateau Marmont. We're told: "Kate and Orlando are definitely more than just good friends now.
"They were kissing and cuddling in the corner of the lobby bar and didn't seem to care who saw them. They even stayed past closing time because they were enjoying each other's company."
The Chateau Marmont is not the place to go if you want to keep a blossoming romance under wraps, one source tells us, adding: "It's like coming out without actually issuing a statement."
I always kind of thought these two were dating anyway, so I'm fine with this couple. I'll probably just continue to barely care about either of them, if that's okay with you guys.
• Mary Kate Olsen owns it, looks hot. [DListed]
• Owen Wilson Say Anythinged the shit out of Kate Hudson. [CityRag]
• Yes, it turns out "Sutten Pierce" was completely made up. Now, we get to wait and see what Britney really named the new baby. [Celebitchy]
• Humping Jim Carrey is "beautiful," "spiritual," farty. [Junkiness]
• Avril, honey, perhaps you should get your excess saliva situation checked out. [Egotastic]
• Holy hot mess, Jessica Simpson. [I'm Not Obsessed]
• If Bert and Ernie aren't careful I'm going to have to wash their mouths out with that soap they seem so fond of. [BWE]
• Penelope Cruz and Orlando Bloom may or not be touching naughty bits. [Us Weekly]
Editor
