Radar magazine has jumped on the Mario Lopez train, putting together a gallery of lovely photos featuring Slater in some of Hollywood's most famous photographs. Our favorite is above, because it holds true to Mario's life mission to make an ass of himself. You can check out the rest here and pick your own.
Pamela Anderson, whose mother seems to have the right idea:
It’s really weird because I’ve never been with a girl. Writing about it was as far as I got. Lately my mother’s said, ‘I wish you were gay, considering your choice in men.’
Everyone's favorite relationship guru, Spencer Pratt, gets patriotic on us this week with his Radar advice column. A woman writes in to ask if she should stay faithful to her deployed husband or begin a secret lesbian relationship with another military wife. Um, OK. Spencer then describes what cheating means to him, and it's kind of deep until he suggests a three-way.
The aforementioned husband must be really proud to serve our country in order to protect our freedoms — freedoms like receiving cheating advice from a D-list reality show loser.
This week's Spencer Pratt advice column is an issue near and dear to his heart: "How can I stop feeling bad about banging a celeb?" If we had a dollar for every time we asked ourselves that, we'd be broke, but you can rest assured Spence knows what he's doing. Except replace "celeb" with "D-list reality show pony."
You didn't think we had forgotten about the weekly advice dished out by Spencer Pratt, did you? America's favorite d-bag is back, and this time he's advising a gay man on how to manipulate and humiliate his straight friends. Spencer dispenses a golden nugget of wisdom in which he points out that, without evidence, you have no case. So that whole thing where you and Heidi went on every talk show imaginable and declared that there really was an LC sex tape but no proof — what was that about?
It's called taking your own advice. Try it.
There are times when we ask ourselves, "Who the hell would seek advice from Spencer Pratt?" That's why his Radar magazine column is informational — it reminds the world that Spence isn't the only tool in America. This week, a reader is suffering the age-old dilemma of how to tell part of his crew that he can't roll with them — after all, the exclusive clubs don't let in more than five guys holding hands at a time. Or something like that.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you, guy.
This week's Radar magazine advice column treads into vomit-inducing territory: Spencer Pratt discusses butt sex.
Some loser wants to know how long you have to date someone before you can participate in said recreational activities, and we'll just go out on a limb here and say he's as big of a tool as the guy dishing out ill-advised guidance. But all is right in the world again when Spence gains back his reputation as King of the Douches when he mentions a poignant quote from his boxing coach. The fact that he even feels the need to bring up a trainer is lame enough, not to mention the fact that it's likely just a reference to Heidi and her new punching bags.
In this week's Radar magazine advice column, Spencer Pratt helps a guy whose girlfriend walks all over him and is "crazy jealous." According to Spence, said guy isn't making his girlfriend feel loved — perhaps he should try videotaping her while she awkwardly frolics on the beach? If that doesn't work, it's probably best to end things, as "that's a relationship [Spencer] wouldn't want to be in."
To be fair, if anyone is an expert in awful relationships, it's him.
This week's Radar magazine advice column courtesy of Spencer Pratt does the impossible: The advice seeker may in fact be a bigger tool than Spence himself, with phrases such as "hella mad" and his admission that, although he's pissed his girlfriend cheated on him, he has indeed "stepped out on her" as well.
The Spencer mentality, it is multiplying.
Radar magazine continues its assault on the universe this week with another Spencer Pratt advice column. This time around, Spence counsels a young man who is suddenly on his own financially to find a rich girlfriend — which could be difficult, because he also advises to not buy drinks for girls. Oh, and buy fake ice, just like Spence did when he proposed to Heidi Montag.
Chivalry at its finest.
Spencer Pratt's back this week with more words of wisdom for Radar magazine readers. This time he tells a girl to "give the guy what he's been waiting for" because he deserves it. And yes, it means exactly what you think it does.
Quite a catch, that guy.
We have a huge crush on Arrested Development's Gob Bluth, which automatically leaks over to Will Arnett. He's seen here posing for a Radar magazine shoot, and the exquisiteness of the photos is simply breathtaking. Way better than that time Lindsay Lohan stripped for New York magazine.
Here's the full article, in which he constantly refers to the publication as Gaydar magazine and makes us fall even more in love.
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Radar magazine just debuted Spencer Pratt's latest endeavor: an advice column. It's as ridiculous as you would expect, with such gems as "I flipped a couple haters at Benihana just last night" and "Treat [your girlfriend] like a princess — it's only for a weekend."
So inquiring minds want to know: Who wouldn't want to take advice from Spencer?
He goes on to address the haters, the mother-daughter bond and a bed-wetting problem. All his words of wisdom after the jump.
THE APOCALYPSE IS COMING "[Spencer] Pratt … is getting his own advice column in Radar magazine. Pratt's new column — titled 'YO SPENCER!' — will debut in Radar's April issue. 'Spencer is never afraid to speak his mind,' Radar editor Maer Roshan said. 'When asking for advice, it's good to have someone who will be brutally honest with you, and tell it like it is.'"
Spencer Pratt, in a new interview with Radar:
My grandma, who is 81, was at my birthday dinner last night, and she was saying in her whole life—which has been miserable for the most part—the one thing that has made her happiest is getting to read the tabloids, watch The Hills, and be a part of this weird pop culture phenomenon. She wears two buttons with my face on it. And if my grandmother is crying for joy in the last years of her life, then it is all worth it.
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Radar has the scoop:
The consensus seems to be that the device failed. TMZ asks "Is the SCRAM a Sham?" and the LAT sarcastically declares "Yeah hey, that SCRAM bracelet worked really well, didn't it."
But Radar has learned that the device registered Lindsay's drinking exactly as it was supposed to. "We're very confident that it was working properly," says SCRAM spokesperson Kathleen Brown. "In fact there are a number of diagnostics that ensure it." But even though the bracelet registered the actress's drinking, it isn't designed to transmit that information on the spot. Instead it works in tandem with a modem, which is placed in Lohan's home. Meaning Linds could have attend the binge drinking party of the century, but as long as she stayed far enough away from the modem, the proper authorities would be none the wiser until (and if) she stumbled home.
Who are these proper authorities? They're whoever Lindsay and her representatives wanted them to be
Ahhhh, technology: So amazingly intricate on the inside and yet so vulnerable to simple human fraud on the outside.
Remember when I told you that the Vanity Fair/Bono collaboration was purely wasteful bullshit? Well now the good, insightful, like-minded folks over at Radar have taken things a couple steps further and gathered data about exactly how wasteful that bullshit was. For instance: "The budget of a relatively cheap Hollywood blockbuster, $150 million, could buy enough mosquito netting to help prevent 30 million Africans from contracting malaria." And did you know that the budget for the photo shoot that produced the covers for that issue could have paid for thousands of computers for poor African children? Graydon, you got some 'splaining to do!
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Whoops! How about some impromptu Photo Hunt courtesy of Radar?
If you're going to plainly doctor photographs and completely give up on even marginal credibility, you should probably just go the route of the Weekly World News and come up with stories that will at least get a chuckle out of people in the checkout line. Next time, put a pig with hooves shaped like swastikas in her arms and say she gave birth to it.
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