• Why, Michael? Why? [DListed]
• A photograph of Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson kissing! OMG our head just exploded. Except not. [PS]
• Amy Winehouse requested 48 bottles of Jack Daniels during a two-day stay at the Bestival Festival. What's the big deal? That's just one bottle every hour. [INO]
• Kate Hudson is shacking up with ex-husband Chris Robinson. Raise your hand if you're surprised. [Yeeeah]
• Celebrating Beyonce's birthday with class. [CityRag]
• Rumer Willis blames genetics for her large chin. Obviously. [ICYDK]
Poor Michael Lohan. In just one short week, the former prison inmate publicly fought with his daughter and ex-wife and suffered the loss of his father. But things grew worse over the weekend when Lindsay failed to show up for her grandfather's wake in Long Island, choosing instead to spend her time shopping in Manhattan with girlfriend Samantha Ronson. This forced Mike to discuss Lindsay's absence with the always sympathetic X17 photo agency, which we assume will be followed up with another preposterous exclusive with OK! magazine.
We can't really fault Linds for failing to show up to the wake, because her grandfather's death was never about the passing of a family member — it was an opportunity for Michael to stay in the news. Lindsay's presence at the funeral would have turned the entire event into a circus, which Grandpa Lohan surely didn't deserve.
[Source]
This is the third development today in the Lindsay Lohan-Michael Lohan-Samantha Ronson feud, which just goes to show how eager these people are to lash out via any media outlet who will listen. Michael upped the ante this afternoon by responding to a classier publication than normal: ABC News. It's a sad day when ABC News has gotten in on the Lohan family drama.
Michael had some not-so-nice things to say about both Lindsay and Samantha, then he threw Dina into the mix by saying she's a two-faced mother more concerned with being her daughter's friend. Tell us something we didn't know, Mike. Most endearing is the part where he insults Lindsay's decreasing movie salary — but he wants her to be "in a good place." What a sweetheart.
It's really difficult to explain the disaster that is Michael Lohan's view of the world, so we'll let him speak for himself (after the jump). CONTINUED »
Well, that was fast: After Lindsay Lohan issued a statement to Access Hollywood in response to her father's cries for attention and then Samantha Ronson posted a MySpace rant about Michael's idiocy, Linds took to her MySpace to vent some more. Because evidently enough hurtful things haven't been said amongst the Lohan clan.
We feel for Lindsay a bit, because her father truly is a media whore, but she lost us when she insisted that her mother is the goddess of all things pure and good in this world. Um, no. To make matters worse, she also does that weird thing with the hyphens, just like Sam.
This is way less entertaining without Anderson Cooper around to provide commentary. CONTINUED »
We've come to the conclusions that the Lohan family can't survive without being involved in some sort of public feud. The latest was with America's hero, Anderson Cooper, but this time they're keeping it inside the family and battling father Michael Lohan. Oh boy.
Upon news that Lindsay's girlfriend Samantha Ronson plans to write a tell-all, Michael went into a tirade accusing Sam of using LiLo for fame. Mike's not so self-aware, is he? In response, Lindsay pulled her dad aside and had a mature talk about how his actions hurt her. Just kidding, she went to Access Hollywood to announce that her father is "out of control."
So now it's Samantha's turn, and she unleashed her anger via MySpace, Brooke Hogan-style. CONTINUED »
Lindsay Lohan's freak-sistah (not Ali) is getting a chance to tell her possibly-insightful story of growing up a real-life Tenenbaum. Samantha Ronson is in talks to pen a memoir about her life, and while everyone is freaking out that Samantha is using her relationship with LiLo to garner interest (she is), the DJ/club owner/child-of-a-socialite probably has some juicy niblets from her own life that don't involve Fire Crotch. Is Ronson a legitimate celebrity without Lindsay? No. But that's not usually a criteria for authors.
Best part of the whole book lead up?
• This girl needs to back off of Michael Phelps immediately or there's going to be trouble. [DListed]
• Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo hang out with Lindsay and Samantha in a desperate attempt to stay relevant. [PS]
• Felicity Huffman must have a death wish. [Yeeeah]
• Paula Abdul is undergoing neck surgery, because how else is she going to get more painkillers? [ICYDK]
• There's cheerleading in the Olympics? Really? [CityRag]
• Katherine Heigl got into a small tiff with a cop. Unfortunately, it didn't end in an arrest. [INO]
"Cracks" are beginning to show in Lindsay Lohan's lesbian veneer. Anonymous busy bodies tell OK! that the actress and her gal pal Sam Ronson have been bickering and Lohan's been getting close to the cock:
So it turns out Lindsay Lohan has a MySpace blog, and she's used it this time around to tell us she misses Samantha (complete with a frowny face) and take up for her 14-year-old sister Ali, who is facing one of the toughest battles: boob job rumors.
All i am trying to say is, is that, i was raised with a wonderful family surrounding me, of course we have our ups and downs, but all in all my mother taught us to appreciate what we have been given. Nor would she ever encourage, or allow a 14 year old child to alter her body.
Interesting argument, Linds. So the reason Ali hasn't had a boob job is because of Dina's fine influence? Ha!
• Jessica Simpson attempts her best "sexy" face. [HT]
• "Ali Lohan is ready to follow in big sis Lindsay's musical footsteps" is not a compliment, Ali. Sorry. [INO]
• What the hell happened to Jake Gyllenhaal? [ICYDK]
• Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson got matching tattoos, because that's what BFFs do. [Yeeeah]
• Sacha Baron Cohen's daughter: A mini-Borat. [PS]
• The next classic Hollywood has decided to destroy: The Witches of Eastwick. We give up. [DListed]
Courtenay Semel, who spells her name in the most ridiculous way possible and is described as a "socialite," is the newest loser to win a shot at love with Tila Tequila — and she didn't even have to eat pig vaginas! You may recognize Tila's new girlfriend as Lindsay Lohan's former rumored fling (yes, LiLo kissed some girls before the lovely Samantha Ronson came into her life), but this time around Courtenay has found true love: “I’d seen the show [A Shot at Love] and just needed to meet her … and it just happened.” What just happened? The chlamydia?
Tila insists she's very happy (until the next season of her reality show starts filming, of course):
There are no games. It’s true what they say about lesbians — you meet and then the next day you move in together, because I can’t get rid of her. She pretty much lives at my house.
Sounds like a match made in publicity heaven.
[Source]
Samantha, Mark and Charlotte Ronson grace the pages of the latest issue of Harper's Bazaar in a fairly boring article that only gets exciting when — who else? — Lindsay Lohan becomes the topic of conversation. Naturally, Sam played coy: "I'm not going to talk about Lindsay because she's my friend, you know? She's great. She's also 22 years old. I think people forget that." Maybe people forget she's only 22 years old because she looks 40.
So we're actually glad that Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson seem to be making their not-so-secret relationship work — even though we highly doubt it will last, the two of them seem happy for the time being. But when stories like this come out (no pun intended), it's hard not to be annoyed:
Mark Ronson had two women at his feet during his deejay gig at the Hard Rock Hotel Chicago: his sister Samantha and her girlfriend, Lindsay Lohan. During Mark's set, the cuddly twosome sat underneath a table near his feet and had waiters bring them drinks. When they did come out of hiding, Sam … was 'constantly texting with Lindsay, even though Lindsay was seated on the stage near her,' laughed a witness. 'They'd text and giggle and just stare at each other.'
[Source]
Converted Christian ex-con Michael Lohan says that were his daughter, Lindsay, to marry her girlfriend, Samantha Ronson, it would probably be without his blessing.
"I haven’t heard anything (about an upcoming wedding) from Lindsay, but if she was marrying Sam, I don’t think she’d ask me to walk her down the aisle,” says Michael. “She knows about my (Christian) faith … she just wouldn’t ask."
Yay, sanctimoniousnesses! And hypocrisy! And religions supposedly based on love that simultaneously prevent fathers from truly expressing love for their daughters! Jesus Christ!
• Eva Mendes flashes everyone for half a second in her new Calvin Klein commercial. Predictably, the world is going nuts. (Slightly NSFW) [ICYDK]
• Terrible idea of the day: Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson are planning to get married. Oh, and it's going to coincide with her album release, of course. [INO]
• Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal will not be getting married this winter. Why anybody cares is beyond us. [PS]
• More proof of the end of days: Justin Timberlake might host the Oscars. [DListed]
• Balthazar Getty finally wised up and dumped Sienna Miller. [Yeeeah]
• Just what we've always wanted: A gallery of Chris Brown's tattoos. [CityRag]
Is it any wonder a guy that looks like this is writing Lindsay Lohan's new songs for her and working on Lohan lover Samantha Ronson's forthcoming album? I have no idea what kind of music this Sam Sparro makes, but good money says we should all get ready for a lot of electronic keys and a vocoder.
I'm more than willing to admit that I (loosely) fit the "hipster" mold, but that doesn't mean that I'm forbidden from saying I hate goddamn hipsters.
"'She's not a particularly good DJ. When you see her DJ, she really looks asleep at the wheel. She'll smoke cigarettes and just click through the songs on her laptop,' said Ian Drew, Us magazine's editor at large. 'She's like the friend with a bunch of records that you had come over when you had house parties in your parents' basement. The more drunk or high you get, the better she sounds.' Her draw?"
Editor
