• One of the fattest cats in America, who was abandoned in New Jersey, found a home. Aww. [DListed]
• Pink has some harsh words — via song — for ex Corey Hart. [INO]
• Kim Kardashian takes a break from her hard life to be photographed at the beach. [Yeeeah]
• Denise Richards' reality show may not come back for a second season. We weren't even aware someone was stupid enough to consider it. [ICYDK]
• Who hasn't seen Lindsay Lohan's funbags? [HT]
• Seal and Heidi Klum's family vacation is cuter than yours. [PS]
Who knew the husband of a pixie like Heidi Klum could be so damn mean? We're not saying that we disagree with Seal about the paparazzi being "scum," but he doesn't have to say it to their faces. A simple auf Wiedersehen would suffice.
Nigel Barker has taken a break from babysitting Tyra Banks to be the latest celebrity with a cause. He's on a mission to save baby seals — and whatever he's selling, we're buying.
This clip has everything to make you feel warm and fuzzy inside: Nigel, baby seals … and more Nigel.
In an effort to bolster the ever-assailed decorum of the Internet, Mollygood looks to poetry with Someone Haiku. Each day – using 17 syllables or less – you’re given the opportunity to wax poetic about some piece of flotsam or jetsam that’s washed up on the shores of Mollygood. Hopefully this Zen practice will not only bathe you in self-discovery, but also bring a touch of Eastern class to a global network of information that’s devolved into nothing more than tit websites and provocative MySpace pictures.
Today's Someone Haiku winner is Dana:
Big boobs, one pole
and a crazy horse?
Its like our
honeymoon, Tommy!
Very well done, Dana.
New one under here.
CONTINUED »
In an interview that will air tonight in Germany, Teutonic superwoman Heidi Klum extends an invitation into her and husband Seal's home to flagging pop star Britney Spears. "She can call me and come live in our house with us for a couple of months," said Klum in that cute-ass accent.
Because Britney probably won't be taking Klum up on her offer, we'd like to go on record to say we're free and we love sauerkraut.
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We've never wanted to fantasize that a woman's breasts are whisker-bearing animal eyes and her naval a pursed mouth, but obviously some people do. That's gross. But even more unappealing is the million-dollar carnival thrown in honor of a bunch of underwear. We know Victoria's secret: People are gullible.
Did you know that white women love black men? Unless they're crazy, they go crazy for them. There's a whole website that explains why, and even more information available through Google.
After a solid six minutes of research, we've learned that perhaps the biggest reason (get it?) white women swoon for black men is because they like their abnormally large genitalia. Now, we know it sounds antiquated and even a little racist, but trust us, the information is everywhere on the internet. Oh, and fucking daytime television. Here's Heidi Klum's response when asked by Oprah how she and Seal fell in love:
"I met him in a hotel lobby in New York City and he came in just from the gym and I was sitting there and I was, like, wow," Klum tells Oprah Winfrey on her show's Superstar Couples episode set to air Thursday.
Wow, as in Seal was wearing bicycle shorts.
"And I pretty much saw everything," says Klum. "The whole package."
From that moment on, the passion never died.
True romance lives! Unfortunately, both the horse-penised Martin Luther King Jr and the dignity he briefly injected into American race relations are still dead.
Last evening marked the 59th Annual Emmy Awards (which I've heard were unyieldingly boring). Although they remain one of the least merit-based awards in history, the Emmys are one of the sharpest, and that should count for something.
After the jump, the gowns! Oh, the gowns!
CONTINUED »
Every time some backwater jackass goes, "I don't want my daughter dating black fellas," the new rule is that you need to show them pictures of Heidi Klum and Seal. "See, dude," you'll say, "you don't want your daughter dating Adebisi, and that's cool, but Seal? Come ooooooon." If that doesn't work just go, "You're so fucking stupid," and hand him a computer and a library card.
More where that came from.
CONTINUED »
Heidi Klum and Seal are out and about in LA this week, slowly prancing directly into the lead of the "Best Hollywood Couple" race. They're attractive, unassuming and quiet, so what's not to like?
The only thing I can think of is that some people think their baby's gross. Calling a baby ugly is stupid on multiple levels but, the good news is that even if you think li'l' Johan isn't hot now, he's gonna be the best thing going in a few years.
Here's why: by being the product of a fairly ugly, British, black man and an intimidatingly beautiful, German woman, he has now been blessed with what is called "hybrid vigor." Basically, because his parents are completely opposite in the way of genes, Johan's going to get the best of both worlds and none of the crap. If you breed a pug with another pug, that dog won't be able to breathe when they're older. But, if you breed a pug with a lab, the mutt doggy will be sucking in air well into its teens. Get it? Regression to the mean. Johan's gonna be great! None of his dad's horrible skin disease and none of his mom's too big boobs.
• Demi returns to Vanity Fair…in a kooky hat. [popbytes]
• Do you think everyone around Heidi and Seal was yelling "Make Out" as loudly as I would have if I were there? No, and that's probably for the best. [PopSugar]
• Unlucky in love Halle Berry may be knocked up. Congrats to her, but I just hope her male model boyfriend doesn't bolt. [HollyScoop]
• Well, DC sounds like a good place to start. [DListed]
• I'm not usually pro-book burning…[A Socialite's Life]
• Jessica Alba does not want you to stare at her ass. Not at all. [Egotastic]
• Maybe Kid Rock and Tommy Lee should just call it a draw and go find themselves a few of the other million blonde bimbos out there. [BWE]
• Working with Justin and Scarlett sounds like a real blast. [INO]
Meet Heidi Klum and Seal's newest little person, Johan Riley Fyodor Taiwo Samuel. That baby is less than a month old and is it just me or does Heidi Klum appear to have already lost a good amount of lbs? Either way, they're probably trying to get pregnant again. Boy do they love babies. The couple talked to People about their new kid:
"Everyone had the biggest smiles on their faces once Johan arrived," Klum tells PEOPLE.
And the big siblings are "so helpful," Klum says. "Leni helps us sing lullabies when Johan has trouble falling asleep."
Having three kids younger than 3 keeps Klum and Seal, who wed in Mexico in 2005, on their toes. "It's never boring or quiet in our home," she says, "but we are truly blessed to have three healthy children."
She adds: "We love that they will grow up close in age," she adds. "This is what Seal and I have always wanted: a home filled with children's laughter."
Well aren't they just fucking precious. Sorry, me and my throat are in the depths of hell. Forgive my bitterness.
As you may have heard, on Wednesday afternoon Heidi Klum gave birth to her third child, a bouncing baby boy named Johan. People reports:
Johan Riley Fyodor Taiwo Samuel was born Wednesday at 5:01 p.m. in Los Angeles. "He is healthy, beautiful and looks just like his mother," according to the post signed by Seal.
In announcing the 8 lb. 11 oz. arrival, the new dad wrote, "To our children, a brother/ To our parents, a grandson/ To my wife and I, a son/ To our family, a blessing."
Congrats to the happy couple. May they continue to breed, because everyone loves a pregnant Heidi. Everyone. Okay, me especially.
[Source]
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Imagine walking down the street in the Meatpacking District of Manhattan, minding your own business, nursing a hangover perhaps, and looking up to see Heidi Klum, Seal, Gwen Stefani, Gavin Rossdale and their spawn just sauntering down the street. Oooh, imagine even better if you got there at the exact moment to witness Heidi, the best air kisser in the world, give the whole crew air kisses. So, so adorable. And smoking hot.
[Source]
Sometimes I feel guilty for demanding that Heidi Klum remain pregnant for the rest of her life because she is so freaking gorgeous when she's knocked up, but then I see pictures like these and I lose the guilt, because she is so freaking gorgeous, adorable, and happy when she's all pregs. I also realize that I'm not the only person in H-Klum's life that feels this way (not that I'm, ya know, in her life, per se). From Life Magazine:
Seal always says “You are my number one” and that the children come after me. I think that that’s important. You have to be happy and functioning and successful in your relationship. The parents have to be number ones to each other in order to give the [proper] love to their children. . . . He always says that he finds me the most beautiful when I’m pregnant. He thinks what a woman’s body can do is amazing.
She also went on to talk about her beautiful (and ever-expanding) family:
"In Germany - and this started with a newspaper headline - they call us 'the Patchwork Family,'" she says. "I was like, 'Hmm, is this an insult or is this positive?' I talked to Seal about it, and we're like, it's actually kind of great - we're all different shades and we came together and we love each other."
So. F-ing Cute.
[Source]
It's a good thing Heidi Klum looks so hot when she's pregnant, because she can't seem to stay away from it. She and Seal are reportedly expecting another freaking baby. US Weekly has the story:
Supermodel Heidi Klum and her husband, singer Seal, 43, are expecting their third child, a source close to the couple confirms to Us Weekly. The couple also have a son, Henry, 9 months, and a daughter, Leni, 2, from Klum’s previous relationship with race car driver Flavio Briatore.
“You’d never have known if you saw her at the Council of Fashion Designers of America Awards [on June 5],” says the source. “She’s just starting to show.” Klum, 33 — along with her family — are currently in NYC finishing up the latest installment of Project Runway, which debuts July 12 on Bravo.
“She’s in a really good place,” says the source. “She loves her family. She loves being a mom.” A rep for Klum had no comment.
Loook's like some couple doesn't care all the much about our overpopulation problem, now do they? Geez.
Congrats to the happy couple. Especially to Heidi, for whom I'm sure it's become a sadistic pleasure to repeatedly rub just how quickly she can revert to her model body after having kids in the face of all the other mothers out there.
[Source]
Joy of Joys, Project Runway 3 is almost upon us! The third season of the best reality show on television (and I watch a lot of reality tv) starts June 12 at 10PM.
Clearly bursting with anticipation themselves, the show's host Heidi Klum and husband Seal took their pups out for a stroll in NYC yesterday.
Say what you want about Seal not measuring up to Heidi, but they are freaking adorable. I'm a leeetttle bit sad that Heidi will not be preg-preg during the upcoming season, as she glowed like the sweet morning sun in the last one, but I suppose I will just have to enjoy her standard radiance. Fingers crossed for a mid-season performance from Seal himself; it's been too long, "Kiss from a Rose", far too long.
I love me my ProjRun something fierce and cannot wait for the upcoming season. I can only hope it is full of nutjobs and crybabies. If you obsessively check the Bravo website to see whether there is new information up, you are probably familiar with Tim Gunn's Season Three Audition blog entry. If not, I suggest you get on that–it is full of wonderful little hidden gems. This, however, is by far my favorite description of having to reject someone:
Our in-and-out record was 17 seconds. It felt unkind, but necessary.
Cough. Enough said.
Editor
