THIS IS GOOD FOR THE KIDS • "Suri Cruise is hotter than Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's kids. At least according to Forbes.com's 'Hollywood's 10 Hottest Tots.' Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' 2-year-old daughter topped the second annual list, which ranks celeb kids 5 years old and younger based on media attention and their parents' popularity."
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Brad Pitt's photography is finally ready for public consumption, thanks to the latest issue of W magazine. The beautiful actor shot multiple pictures of his significant other, Angelina Jolie, and the couple's army of children. The photos are gorgeous, of course, but we are a little perplexed by Angie's strange ability to turn into insufferable Project Runway contestant Kenley Collins.
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We care about our readers, so this is a public service announcement: The world is ending. How do we know this? Simple: It says in the Book of Xenu that a handful of celebrities will be arrested within a matter of days, then the Clay Aiken Claby will arrive at 8:08 on 08/08/08, and finally, both Brangelina and Britney Spears will step foot in New York City at the same time.
The final step occurred today when Brad and Angelina arrived in Manhattan with their army of children in tow, while Britney also spent her day with some kids in the Bronx. You know what comes next: The battle for the world's soul between Shiloh Jolie-Pitt and Suri Cruise (yeah, she's here too). … Or maybe we've had too much to drink. We blame Sarah Palin. She killed Rupert, you know. CONTINUED »
Here's more pictures of the Wonder Twins, Knox and Vivienne Jolie-Pitt. They look (predictably) like babies, but the main stars of the photos are the other kids, who — we'll admit it — are too adorable for words.
Visit People.com for the pics.
Happy birthday to Shiloh Jolie-Pitt — may you have many more years full of tabloid covers and paparazzi stalkers.
CUTE KIDS "Maddox, 6, is constantly pushing Pax, 4, around in an attempt to show him who's boss, says a source. 'But Pax is no wimp, and he fights back.' But it's little Zahara, 3, who really rules the roost! 'She screams and shouts at the boys when she doesn't get her way,' says the source. Not even Shiloh, 22 months, is safe — and the toddler has the battle scars to prove it. 'Z is always pushing or scratching her.' Zahara's picking on Shiloh is usually motivated by snacks. 'Z once clawed Shiloh's cheek after she tried to take her cookie,' says an insider who witnessed one incident. "She's always pulling on Shiloh's hair so she can steal her food.'"
• Hey, it's a nominative determinism gallery! [CityRag]
• Charlotte York has a sex tape!!!!???!?!?!?!??! [DListed]
• Jennifer Aniston and her "ridiculous body." We're not sure if that's a compliment. [PS]
• Tara Reid and her ridiculous body. That's definitely not a compliment. [HT]
• David Beckham's new tattoo supposedly reads as follows: "Birth 'til Death, rich or poor, it’s all up to God." Profound. [INO]
• Thanks for this, tabloids: "Angelina Jolie buys Shiloh Cheetoes" [ICYDK]
• Angelina Jolie is in Iraq! No, not fighting. [Jossip]
• Aretha Franklin's R-E-S-P-E-C-T-I-N-G her body with a new fitness program. [DListed]
• Vince Vaughn takes some time off of drinking, smoking and whoring to work. God bless him. [PS]
• Lindsay Lohan says "fuck you." [HT]
• Javier Bardem went crazy because of a weird haircut. Maybe he's not as cool as we thought he was. [ICYDK]
• Jennifer Love Hewitt's fiancé doesn't care if you think she's fat. [INO]
• "Shiloh Jolie-Pitt Kidnapping Scare" [Yeeeah]
• Street art. Enjoy. [CityRag]
UK's perennially outrageous Sun is reporting that, in an interview with Look magazine, Angelina Jolie called biological daughter, Shiloh, an "outcast." Allegedly, she then added this:
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In today's Page Six, a scathing review of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's nomadic parenting style:
So far, the Jolie-Pitt clan has lived in New Orleans, Paris, Namibia, Berlin and, most recently, New York, where Maddox attended the prestigious Lycée Francais for just six weeks. Now they're in L.A., where Jolie is shooting "The Changeling." Pitt and Jolie are rumored to have enrolled at least one of the kids at Universal Studio's child-care center.
"With the moves, the kids just don't invest in relationships, because they're going to lose them anyway," Hall told Page Six's Marianne Garvey. "They think: 'Why bother? I'm not gonna stick around. We're gonna pick up and go, and the loss of friends is painful.' "
Lucky for these children, not letting others into one's heart only hurts until one discovers drugs and alcohol, and in Hollywood that happens early. They'll be happy soon enough.
Here the Jolie-Pitt family en masse exits Chicago's Field Museum Saturday. Museum insiders say the children particularly enjoyed the Field's dinosaur exhibit, which includes the largest and most complete T Rex skeleton known to man. When the kids inevitably asked how the prehistoric beasts were wiped out of extinction, sources say Brad and Angelina explained that they were punished for asking too many questions about why their eyes were different than their mommy's.
How long until this flaxen-haired angel learns to wield the subtle but mighty "I'm the Real One" stick when arguing with her siblings? I'd say about two seconds after "How does Zahara's hair do that?"
Not sure if I agree with the directorial decision to make Rocco Ritchie such a mercurial ball of anger, but the rest of it passes the smell test. Happy belated Father's Day.
• Famous baby walking. [ICYDK]
• Too close for comfort. [DListed]
• Some sports player wore the hat of a sports team from a different city than the one he plays in and now everyone's mad (see how silly this sounds). [TMZ]
• Stacy Keibler playing beach volleyball in a Cuervo tank. She's Spring Break dreams incarnate. [HT]
• Apparently, not everyone finds her "licious." [CityRag]
• Lohan supports Britney's newest fifth of an hour comeback.
The Jolie-Pitts are officially adopting a baby boy from Vietnam:
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are making the proper arrangements to adopt a child (probably a baby boy) from from Vietnam and find a sibling for Maddox, 5, Zahara, 2, and 10-month-old Shiloh. The superstar couple and their big news make their way onto the cover of this week’s Us Weekly and People Magazine.
Since January, the Jolie-Pitt family has settled into their $3.5 million mansion in New Orleans, where Brad has been filming The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (kissing another woman!). But soon they’ll return home to Los Angeles, where Brad will wrap up his Button filming.
Following the Vietnamese adoption, Angelina and Brad have told MollyGood exclusively that they would like to then obtain a very similar baby from Iraq. They say they'll then set their sights on Iranian and North Korean orphanages.
• Benetton should quit wasting money on photo shoots and just start using paparazzi pics of these guys. [DListed]
• "Womb Raider" is a good frat nickname. [Glitterati]
• Anne Hathaway sacrificing realism for puritan ideals, saying that sometimes kisses are "too real." See you at ABC Family, Anne. [HT]
• Sienna Miller really unabashedly acknowledging her love of drugs. [CityRag]
• Kanye West spending his money wisely and paying $4,000 shipping Indian food from England. For that kind of money you can almost buy an Indian person and have them cook for you. Seriously. [HR]
• Popular culture now inspiring surgery for mentally and physically unstable people. [Jossip]
• Rachael Ray attacked by a dog, which she in turn killed and used to create some "yummo" chili in under half an hour. [NYP]
• It's all the Coldplay. It's making her dreary. [ASL]
• Idol babe allowed to stay because she's not fat and black like the other one who did porn. [DListed]
• Aren't women not supposed to share bathing suits? [Egotastic]
• The entire security team that escorted Diddy's son to the lap dance party has been fired. [Glitterati]
• Carrie Fisher is the number one nerd crush. [ICYDK]
• Mama Pitt taking out the adopted babies. [PopSugar]
• Howard K. Stern, literally pimping. Maybe he's tainted the profession enough that rap stars will stop thinking it's cool to make women give you their money. [INO]
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