Last night was the first time I sat through Dancing With the Stars, and let me tell you: American Idol it is not. I could watch Ryan Seacrest lead me through that nonsense five nights a week, but I can't imagine watching this ballroom competition on a regular basis for the next few months. The only thing keeping me around is the promise of future husband Lance Bass, who is also being wooed by his partner, So You Think You Can Dance alum Lacey Schwimmer. After dancing the cha cha, she confesses that she once believed Lance would marry her. Pshh, please.
And after the jump, my second favorite contestant, Cloris Leachman. Who knew the 82-year-old would inject some life into this drag of a program? CONTINUED »
We won't spoil the five readers who watch So You Think You Can Dance because the main event of last night's finale had nothing to do with the results or contestants. Show regular Wade Robson choreographed a frightening number involving Cirque du Soleil and rabbits. Evidently the routine can be found in Criss Angel's Vegas show, if that tells you anything. But mainly, the entire piece gave me nightmares and ruined rabbits forever. (The clip starts around 2:45)
On last night's So You Think You Can Dance, we were treated to Lil Demon, an adorable 6-year-old breakdancer who seemed to be missing the famewhore gene, as evidenced by his shy demeanor. But that's OK: With a few more shows under your belt, Lil Demon (or can we just call you Lil?), you'll be your family's main cash cow in no time.
Every week, a bunch of “real” people say really stupid things on reality TV. These are their stories.
10. "How do you spell 'roommate'?" — Brooke Hogan, Brooke Knows Best
Despite the fact that Dina Lohan is an executive producer of Living Lohan, her influence over the editing process can't hide the fact that she is a famewhore first and mother second. During last night's episode, Dina was "surprised" by her son Cody and "forced" to perform at the Pearl in Las Vegas in a totally spur-of-the-moment routine with some So You Think You Can Dance hasbeen. It's all too much, and the sooner this show comes to an end, the better.
Katy Perry pranced around the stage during last night's So You Think You Can Dance as she sang "I Kissed a Girl," but instead of enjoying her performance, I felt extremely uncomfortable. Someone needs to teach the girl how to command the stage instead of walking back and forth … and back and forth … and back and forth. Also? Sometimes it's better to just lip sync and call it a day.
Every week, a bunch of “real” people say really stupid things on reality TV. These are their stories.
10. "[Mo'Nique] didn't like me because I'm white and skinny and I don't really understand why a comedian was trying to teach us about etiquette to begin with, so I didn't really learn anything. But it was fun, because I got to be on TV." — Pumkin, I Love Money: Meet the All Stars
This be a video of the Olsen twins at last weekend's Bonnaroo, the annual hippie-dippie Tennessee music festival. Watch as the sisters sway their hungry bodies to the plodding stylings of Jack Johnson, dancing a dance called, "Why Can't I Truly Enjoy Anything Anymore?"
Every week, a bunch of “real” people say really stupid things on reality TV. These are their stories.
10. "I need everybody right now to look up to the ceiling. Just look up there, because I think the sprinkler system is gonna come off, that was so darn hot! That's what I'm talking about! Woo!" — Mary, So You Think You Can Dance
Every week, a bunch of “real” people say really stupid things on reality TV. These are their stories.
10. "We have to educate him in this whole tabloidism." — Dina, Living Lohan
Every week, a bunch of “real” people say really stupid things on reality TV. These are their stories.
10. "I'm like a coat in a closet, just hangin' in there." — Flavor Flav, Flavor of Love 3
If you’re like us, you lapped up last night’s So You Think You Can Dance season premiere. Obviously we don’t have any favorites yet, but this popper — Robert Muraine — absolutely blew us away. But, yes, we agree with Mia Michaels — Muraine may not be of this world.
Speaking of out of this world — what about that guy who danced in his underwear? What a mess!
Check him out, after the jump.
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