WHAT'S GOOD ENOUGH FOR FERGIE IS GOOD ENOUGH FOR AMERICA "First word on Barack Obama's historic nomination acceptance speech from a bevy of celebrities in attendance was decidedly partisan: 'It was excellent,' Black Eyed Peas singer Fergie said. 'It was amazing.' 'Incredible,' said Jessica Alba simply, before joining Fergie, Rosario Dawson, Wilmer Valderrama and Kerry Washington at a private exit from Invesco Field. Alba was at the speech with husband Cash Warren. Other celebrities in attendance included George Lucas with girlfriend Mellody Hardon and his daughter, Forest Whitaker with wife Keisha and Star Jones, and Daniel Dae Kim of 'Lost,' who posed for pictures with the Hawaii delegation."
Al Reynolds, a washed up Wall Streeter who was once married to washed up talk show host Star Jones, took to YouTube yesterday in an attempt to share the “real” Reynolds. Or, as he puts it, “The Al Reynolds You Don’t Know.” Did we ask?
Far too self-important to speak into the camera — so pedestrian! — Reynolds instead speaks with a journalist, who asks the hard-hitting, tabloid ready questions, like “Are you gay?” The answer, of course, is a long-winded, tortuous and overly prepared “no.” It begins thusly:
Adorable heterosexual Al Reynolds has adorable things to say about his adorable split from adorable Star Jones. You know, the type of cloudy, ambiguous things that could easily be taken out of context, or placed in context, to suggest he might be playing for another team. Things like:
Sad news for those of you left who believed in Star Jones and Al Reynolds' fairytale romance. The marriage, which has survived three years, is on the verge of ending.
'They hadn’t been seeing eye to eye for months and had already spent a great deal of time apart,' a friend of the couple told the [National] Enquirer. “Finally, Star decided it was over. She told Al at the end of January that he had 30 days to get his act together or get out.'
Another insider … confirmed the breakup and revealed Star’s intention to make it permanent. 'Star is planning to divorce Al. … I think Star felt Al had spent their marriage riding her success while she did all the heavy lifting. She resented it. Deep down, Star is a very old-fashioned woman who believes a man should support her emotionally, physically and financially. She now believes Al failed her.'
Star really is a nightmare, isn't she? She's not even a good beard.
[Source]
After yesterday morning on The Today Show calling former colleague Tyra Banks "fat," total fucking sellout Janice Dickinson recanted her statement that very afternoon on the formerly-obese Star Jones' show.
The self-proclaimed "coiner of the term supermodel" – not the self-proclaimed "supermodel" – called her remark "dumb," adding, "Tyra, you're not fat; you're just…you."
Star Jones and her infernal racket continue to ruin lives, this time those of a group of young women who came together at the Detroit non-profit Full and Fabulous to better deal with their weight problems. Jones was supposed to come speak to to the ladies about being fabulous while also being full, and she was supposed to be paid $25,000 to do so, but the NPO could only come up with 17 grand and that's when things got less than fabulous.
…Jones took their $17,000 deposit, two air tickets she upgraded to first class on their dime, and a suite in a five-star hotel - but never showed up for the event at Detroit's Martin Luther King Jr. High School when Full and Fabulous couldn't come up with the rest of the cash. Instead, she went to the Super Bowl (which was being held in Detroit) and a fashion show, and arranged her own book-signing at a Borders.
Who knew Detroit was so luxurious? Certainly not its residents!
A judge has ruled Jones needs to repay the organization $20,000, but we doubt that will pan out. Keep you posted, though. Until then, what have the members of Full and Fabulous learned: "Never expect a celebrity who thinks they have arrived to remember where they came from, and most certainly, don't expect them to give back." And don't you forget it.
If you've not yet tired of wealthy, educated, maternal, black talking heads sporadically using country shibboleths ("keep ya' draws on") in order to exude approachability, then get excited for Star Jones' new talk show. Today's episode looked into the intricacies of the Dustin Diamond sex tape, which premiered on TMZ about a year ago. Common and timely, Ms Jones!
PS Watch until the end to see Screech rendered speechless by a pornographer.
PPS What the fuck is up with this woman's bronchial wheeze? I call not walking up a flight of stairs with Star Jones.
• Above is the video for "The People," the first single off Common's new album Finding Forever. If you know what's good for your ears and mind you'll a. go buy this record (another hit!) and b. go buy this magazine, in which Mollygood editor Cord Jefferson and Common discuss hip hop, love and selling out.
• It's been a bad day for little people. [DListed]
• Still got it! [HT]
• "Herpin" is an unfortunate surname, huh? It's almost as bad as "Wharton" and "Aidsin." [ICYDK]
• Diva Star Jones didn't lose weight through diet and exercise. Really shocked that she took the shortcut. Wow. [Yeeeah]
• Why wasn't Tom Cruise mentioned? [CityRag]
• "It's actually quite complicated, I just make it look easy." [NYT]
Old placid face, Nicole Kidman, is said to be guest starring on the new season of Nip/Tuck, along with several other guests TBA:
Ryan Murphy, the show's creator, tells Access that there are at least ten guest stars lined up this season, one of which is Academy Award winning megastar Nicole Kidman! Kidman herself has not been reached yet for comment on this announcement.
"Nicole Kidman's coming. I don't know when but that's my scoop. People say, ‘Is she coming or is she not? She wants to do it so we're trying to make it work."
As we learned at the end of last season, the lead characters are moving their practice to Hollywood this season - thus, the higher prominence of more guest celebrities.
Rosie O'Donnell, who made a big impression last season with her racy turn as Dawn Budge, will definitely be returning to the show, Murphy says.
Isn't Nicole Kidman guesting on a show about psychotic plastic surgery patients like Star Jones guesting on a show about hubristic attorneys?
[Source]
• I say it's the glasses. They're crazy flattering. [YBF]
• Portia headed for a relapse? [PopBytes]
• Ummm…I think that baby should have been "Hung Up" in a car seat, Madonna. Sorry to preach, I know I'm not your papa. [HR]
• Death Row records is over. Of course, they'll release albums for years to come, prompting sentimental weirdos to say they're still around. [NYP]
• Reese taking one for the team. Literally. [ASL]
• Fox News trying their hardest to make a "faggot" out of a Southern accent. [Jossip]
• Saying Christina is Hollywood's hottest blond is like saying Pamela Anderson has Hollywood's best boobs. [HT]
• Huge surprise: a gaudy rapper. [ASL]
• I think Love Hewitt looks fine. Lay off, it's only Ghost Whisperer. [TSW]
• Stabler and Benson playing pissed cop/pissed cop with Star Jones. [Jossip]
• Jake Gyllenhaal dating a single mom. [ICYDK]
• Federline shaves his head "extra bald" as a sign of solidarity. I'm not joking. Maybe somebody else is. [Glitterati]
• This yahoo is the Governor of California. Yep, this guy. [CityRag]
• Indian food pranksters don't care about black people. [HR]
• Benetton should quit wasting money on photo shoots and just start using paparazzi pics of these guys. [DListed]
• "Womb Raider" is a good frat nickname. [Glitterati]
• Anne Hathaway sacrificing realism for puritan ideals, saying that sometimes kisses are "too real." See you at ABC Family, Anne. [HT]
• Sienna Miller really unabashedly acknowledging her love of drugs. [CityRag]
• Kanye West spending his money wisely and paying $4,000 shipping Indian food from England. For that kind of money you can almost buy an Indian person and have them cook for you. Seriously. [HR]
• Popular culture now inspiring surgery for mentally and physically unstable people. [Jossip]
• Rachael Ray attacked by a dog, which she in turn killed and used to create some "yummo" chili in under half an hour. [NYP]
• So, you're saying there's Beckingsale boob footage? [Egotastic]
• Celebrity bad fashion is a little gift to each and every one of us. [CityRag]
• Somewhere, Jessica Simpson is watching this, and trying to remember when she was interviewed by Weird Al. [GiggleSugar]
• If you think Star Jones is fat and her husband is gay, she will not make you carry her briefcase. Just a tip. [DListed]
• Damn you, Grey's Anatomy, damn you and your inescapable influence. [PopSugar]
• My real question, though, is why hasn't Diddy videoblogged this shit yet? [HollyScoop]
• The Duff sisters hit the stores in uniform. [INO]
• Pink calls for a boycott of Australian wool. No word yet, however, as to how this pertains to the steel wool on her head. [Us]
• Any word as to whether Lohan's stripper role will actually involve nudity? Yikes. [Yeeeah]
Thanks to the wonderful artist over at Pretty On The Outside, Hallmark may soon be out of business. Now, wouldn't you boss love a SFW version of Britney's vagina? Have a kid in elementary school? Print out some Michael Jackson cards to freak out all the other parents. Got a special beard in your life? Remind her of the eternal love between Star Jones and Al Reynolds.
They're awesome, and free, and, now that I think about it, would go perfectly alongside (what do ya know?) a 'Be Adequite' t-shirt.
• Matt Damon is haunted by his past, thank god he's not Ben Affleck. [PopSugar]
• Jessica Biel and Derek Jeter may be a new couple, but my money's on just being work out buddies. [HollyScoop]
• Rocky's back, but he probably shouldn't be. [DListed]
• Why isn't Law and Order harvesting more of its plotlines from starlet feuds? [Egotastic]
• The guests arrive in Italy for Tom and Katie's wedding, including Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony. Is this a case of inviting a vague friend who happens to be talented in the hopes that he/she will give an impromptu performance at the party? Classy. [X17]
• Oh. Dear. Lord. [BWE]
• They're men. They're men of the year! Year! Year! (That was meant to be sung to the tune of the song from Robin Hood: Men in Tights. Just go with it.) [A Socialite's Life]
• Sometimes newspapers and magazines make up quotes. Bastards. [Celebitchy]
• Lohan's plays to everyone's fetish. [CityRag]
• Claudia Schiffer is Goldican. [Yeeeah]
Yes, Star Jones could have dominated this competition (though I would venture to say she is often more "crazed" or "homicidal/hungry" than "dead," but what do I know?), but alas there were no submissions until today. So here she is, always the bridesmaid never the bride (other than that one time…which seems to be going really, really well for ol' Star).
There are still 6 more hours of voting on Round Two of the First Ever MollyGood Dead Eye-Off (Sick of it yet? It'll be over soon. Promise). In case you haven't voted yet, here are the mud wrestling matches currently in progress:
Mary Kate Olsen vs. Paris Hilton
Lindsay Lohan vs. Teri Hatcher
Mischa Barton vs. Beyonce
And the roller coaster that has been Katie Holmes vs. Jessica Simpson
Like yesterday, these poll are open until tonight at midnight EST. (Actually, I had to shut them down about 20 minutes early. Sorry, bittles)
Again, new to the Dead Eye-Off, check here.
Editor
