She stole that lighter! Blah!

Recently disclosed government documents reveal that celebrity ex-mayor of New York Rudolph 9iu1ian1 billed "obscure city agencies" for tens of thousands of dollars in security expenses, all while wooing his then mistress (now wife) Judith Nathan in a months-long extramarital affair taking place all over the swanky, nauseous Hamptons.

The documents…show that the mayoral costs had nothing to do with the functions of the little-known city offices that defrayed his tabs, including agencies responsible for regulating loft apartments, aiding the disabled and providing lawyers for indigent defendants.