America, America, This Is You

We're not usually the type to agree with the boomers who rant about how our youth are being polluted by a society that abuses sex in pop culture, but when seven-year-olds are behaving exactly like people do in the worst of rap videos, we have to admit that perhaps there's something to that argument.

Don't watch the video above if you don't want to begin your day with something awfully depressing.

Aug 21, 2008 · posted by Cord Jefferson, MollyGood · Link · 48 Responses
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Comments (48)

No. 1 chrissy says:

studio 54….months.

bahdum bum!

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 9:36 am
No. 2 Sarah says:

Well, I guess I should at least finish my Crusty-O's before I kill myself…

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 9:42 am
No. 3 Sarah says:

This is the wrongest thing I've ever seen.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 9:43 am
No. 4 maria says:

That's not depressing, that's encouraging!

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 9:50 am
No. 5 Sarah says:

Maria, Huh?

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 10:34 am
No. 6 JD says:

Their parents should all be lined up side by side, and one person should run all the way down the line with their hand out and smack each and everyone of them in the face, and then they should run backwards and backhand them too.


Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 10:36 am
No. 7 Keeblerkahn says:

That is some fine parenting skills on display right there.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 10:38 am
No. 8 queencrone says:

Good LORD! Freak Dancing is NOT the "new" hula hoop.

(Some of our parents in the olden days used to think that the hula hoop was mighty suggestive.
They even went as far as to say, "this could lead to DANCING" *gasp*. If they could see it now…)

Get these babies started in a hopscotch game, and fast!

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 10:54 am
No. 9 TheNewYorker says:

OK so who will report this to the police?

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:00 am
No. 10 bedbugsandballyhoo says:

I would be more disturbed by this, but I just finished watching a puppet show my daughter has been putting together all morning. It consisted of two laundry baskets for a stage, pictures she drew of a wolf, a tiger, a bear, a little girl, and a dragon, which she cut out and pasted on popsicle sticks, and wrote a play about them all going on an adventure together. I think my scenario is more of the norm.
Anyways, who am I to judge if some parents want to raise their children to be their party pals rather than productive members of society? It certainly has made millions for the Lohans. And we all know money makes everyone happy and everything all better.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:06 am
No. 11 srishti says:

Amen JD.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:06 am
No. 12 Sarah says:

I'll do it.
"Hello, 911? There are infants freak dancing on the internets? Yeah, it made me vomit my cereal. Can you do something? Oh - can you get me some more Crusty-O's, too? That was my last bowl. Yeah, of course I'd like to press charges. Okay. Thanks."

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:07 am
No. 13 Sarah says:

"Wait, can you do something about the Lohans, too?"

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:08 am
No. 14 robin says:

Those kids parents need their ass kicked.You could tell that the little girl was being told what to do by someone off camera. My son is just starting school and to think that this is the type of stuff that my son could be exposed to in school.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:27 am
No. 15 Helen A. Handbasket says:

Damn whippersnappers! In my day we only danced within a 5 foot proximity, we just sort of mimed slow dancing without even touching…now get off my lawn!

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:30 am
No. 16 satines_crotch says:

That couldn't have been an ADULT filming this. Could it??

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:31 am
No. 17 Amy Grindhouse says:

Sick as heck, where do they learn this crap? Their parents should be ashamed. Someone call CPS!

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:42 am
No. 18 Suck it! says:

Those parents don't need to be slapped. They need to be sterilized.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 11:48 am
No. 19 Sarah says:

I agree, Suck, but I'd like to add all the Lohan children ass well before it's too late. Stop the madness!

(STM, I wasn't summoning you, I was actually saying "Stop the madness, but I would love to hear what you have to say. Where are you?)

Wait - I'm not okay with eugenics. Oh, I'm so conflicted right now.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 12:06 pm
No. 20 Sarah says:

Shit. I don't usually typo.

"Stop the madness" is what I was saying, not just a dangling quote.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 12:07 pm
No. 21 Suck it! says:

The Lohans all need to be sterilized too. Is it too late to abort Lindsey and her old lady sister?

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 12:08 pm
No. 22 Sarah says:

And did I really say "ass well?" Jeebus, someone help me. I lost my Crusty-O's and I am not well.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 12:11 pm
No. 23 Lisa (#1) says:

Can we start taking bets on who becomes a parent first, little Jimmy or little Sally?

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 12:40 pm
No. 24 HS says:

I need to go scour my eyes out with a brillo pad.
What freaking adult tells a small child how to- scratch that- HOW DID THAT CHILD EVEN KNOW HOW TO DO THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE?!?!?!?

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 12:45 pm
No. 25 ilnazhad says:


Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 1:07 pm
No. 26 yourmom says:

hahahahaha ilnaz

I'm glad I didn't watch it. The paused image is enough for me. Society as a whole is a terribly disturbing thing.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 1:20 pm
No. 27 Luz says:

Reminds me of my friend's kids. No, seriously. Of course, she never should have been a parent either.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 1:36 pm
No. 28 lava says:

thanks to the disclaimer i avoided the play button. britneys cheeto mess was enough for me today.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 2:37 pm
No. 29 Batmamma says:

Gee…I wonder why there are so many problems in the world? If we fixed the root - parenting - just think how much better this world would be. "Honey, just dance like a hoochie and you can grow up to be in your generations Kanye video. Mommy will be so proud!" Sick…

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 2:50 pm
No. 30 Stoney says:

Is it wrong that I want to beat those parents to a bloody pulp? This makes me SICK. God, pull the plug.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 2:53 pm
No. 31 Keeblerkahn says:

You know Sarah, I heard if you lite a candle in a dark room and look into a mirror and say Stop The Madness 3 times, she will appear. Just have plenty of top shelf booze on hand.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 3:33 pm
No. 32 John says:

There is nothing any of us can do to stop civilization from "progressing". So little kids are learning to grind eachother, it's human nature. We are sexual beings. Yes it's sad to watch cuz you want kids to be cute and innocent, but you've got little girls being sold into prostitution all over the planet and I don't see ANYONE doing anything about it. We are a cruel species consumed with having sex and making more of the species, be fruitful and multiply everyone! Those kids are just doing what the bible says, and isn't that what we want? good christian children having as many good christian welfare babies as the planet will allow? it's time to thin the heard.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 4:01 pm
No. 33 tiffany says:

That was very appalling. I can't believe that this went on with other adults in the background cheering them on like they was performing in the the school of arts. Yes, pop culture may be raunchy, but even in some of the videos i have seen i've not seen so much contact, and never a man who got in the "doggie style" position. Those kids looked like grown ups in the 21 and over club, and even some of us don't dance like that, this is sad, and its seems they don't even have a chance, and is about to enter the world of promiscuity.

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 5:25 pm
No. 34 Sarah says:

Stop The Madness.
Stop The Madness.
Stop The Madness.

Where is she?

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 6:34 pm
No. 35 Allie says:

A future prostitute and her pimp!!!! At least the participants in rap videos are ADULTS. Where is child wellfare?????

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 7:34 pm
No. 36 elronj says:

C'mon, people. Remember Footloose? Let them dance, let them dance!

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 7:35 pm
No. 37 Aly says:


Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 8:21 pm
No. 38 Allie says:

Elronj!!!! Are you insane!!!!! I saw footloose and not only was that VERY far from the dancing on this video, they were in high school not pre-school!!!!

Posted: Aug 21, 2008 at 9:05 pm
No. 39 stopthemadness says:

*appears in a cloud of smoke*

*waves hand back and forth in order to see more clearly*


Posted: Aug 22, 2008 at 1:25 am
No. 40 stopthemadness says:

crap, i forgot my drink.

*disappears in a cloud of smoke*

Posted: Aug 22, 2008 at 1:26 am
No. 41 cutee says:

Actually, this is not American culture. Listen to the music and the speech. It's reggaeton, and the people are speaking Spanish. Still a sad sight though…

Posted: Aug 22, 2008 at 6:34 am
No. 42 Sarah says:

Oh. Well. I take back my previous outrage, then - see, I thought these were AMERICAN children. Bring on the infant Latin freak dancers! Ole!

Posted: Aug 22, 2008 at 8:32 am
No. 43 Sarah says:

Dammit, STM. You're never there when I need you anymore.

Posted: Aug 22, 2008 at 9:42 am
No. 44 adeline.jane says:

i'm just happy to see another young girl gain popularity amongst her peers, and thus self esteem, by exploiting her own sexuality! i think its good. real good. real nice. i also really liked how the boy just stood there and followed her ass with his crotch. perfect. she's going to have a backache later. who is going to get her to the chiropractor?

Posted: Aug 22, 2008 at 9:47 am
No. 45 Peeved Guy says:

I can't decide what is more depressing; the video showing kids having pretend intercourse or the comments that are trying to justify it. *sigh*

I'd say we're doomed as a species, but that's not true. Clearly we will reproduce no matter what.

Posted: Aug 22, 2008 at 10:55 am
No. 46 P.S. says:

Great subtext to the header! LMAO

Posted: Aug 22, 2008 at 5:56 pm
No. 47 myles says:

whats disturbing is that there are other kids in the background getting their "freak" on too. that clinches it. i've officially lost faith in the human race

Posted: Aug 22, 2008 at 10:50 pm
No. 48 elmago says:

They are Dominicans. For some reason, they seem to think this is acceptable behavior. This and urinating on the street while having a conversation with their buddies while blasting this music at 3:00 AM. But hey, they have great ball players they're very proud of!

Posted: Aug 24, 2008 at 12:14 am
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