The missives contained in Mollygood's comments sections run the gamut from funny to enlightening to choleric to unreadable, but rarely are they boring and even rarer (thankfully) are they peppered with "OMG she is hottttttttt!" or "z"s in the place of "s"s. Since the swift death of Mollygood, Bad and Poetic, the best of these bon mots have gone relatively unnoticed. The Commies will change all that. Each week, the very best will be highlighted here for greater public consumption and, of course, judgment.
Angriest About Not Being Stereotyped: Marc
eh? what ?
Who wrote this headline and “story”????
Get your head out of your ass, it’s a great outfit for playing and dancing at a disco.
Best Question (But What's "Isalm"?): james_boston
not to get all serious and shit (i don’t wanna get killed in the face) but is scientology any more ridiculous than christianity or isalm or any other religion?
Comment of the Week: thebeachedwhale
People who give cocaine to animals are not animal lovers.
Best Unnecessary Information: Billy
Rambo starts out as a boatman & snake-catcher in this latest…make of this what you will.
Funniest, Most Awful Anecdote of the Week: punchdrunkbunny
I wish you had the clip of Sylvia Browne telling a woman her husband drowned. Only to be corrected by the woman to say that he died in the World Trade Center. Sylvia then said something like, ‘Well, I must have been seeing the fire sprinklers’
Best Made-Up Word: blackmistressdiva
I worked with her on a flick once. Despite her coonery, she’s cool.
The Award for the Commenter Crazy Enough to Also Became a Crazy E-Mailer: JaJa
I think the post and the comments are ridiculous. It’s just two kids and already the hate starts. I can’t see anything wrong with them to be honest.
To be even more honest, I think attacking anything in any way, even remotely related to Michael Jackson is something that has become mandatory in bloggers minds. It’s what’s being expected and it’s getting old.
The bandwagon of ridicule has passed long ago. It’s easy, it’s unoriginal. Jokes about noses wore out over a decade ago.
Reading these responses makes me clear why it made sense for Jackson to cover up their faces. In this context, HE’s the smart one.
Editor
Yay! Goon on ya, j_b!
JaJa was just e-mailing her love. I didn't know we could do that. Now I just need to figure out how to type in my own blood…
Also, I still don't know what coonery is.
I'm so not surprised JaJa was so passionate he/she/it decided it was a good idea to email. Just posting comments is totally played out.
Congrats j_b!!
Lisa: I think it's where you obsessively wash your food before you eat it.
It's a banner day for the male hags, congrats to you all, and the female hags, too, of course.
Hey! Where's Ms Meg, and her "we’re dying of potato chips"????
She was robbed!!
props to our sexy gay boyfriend. Yes, I've upgraded him to sexy. Isalm sounds like something you put on a yummy sammich.
I really am jelous, jaja got to email with our grumpy editor. I didn't know we were able to make Commie pleas directly to, Cord. And I don't care what Jaja says, those nose jokes never go out of style. It's like the little black dress of MJ jokes. Jaja probably wears members only jackets.
Good picks. I did think the "dying of potato chips" from Ms Meg was great as well.
if I were Tim Gunn I would say these picks were, stunning.
So I'll go with Michael Kors and say: impeccable.
(I had to first visit dictionary.com, just to be honest.)
I'll do Heidi now. "I've seen these comments before, they were, blah".
Nina: I really like how I saw YOU in these picks.
*I messed up my hair before I typed.
I was just about to judge Jaja, but then I recalled that I sent several e-mails to Cord for no real reason, too. And then I also remembered that I was certain I would get a response were I to give the right e-mail address. Then I remembered why nobody likes me.
I'm not quite certain that winning my third Commie from Cord is a kind congratulation….or a confirmation that I am crazy….or both….so I'll just say….thank you and… fuck off.
Lisa: Have'nt you ever heard of Sean Coonery?..the best black James Bond that never was?
Coonery and Buffoonery 34 up, 6 down
Antics and behavior displayed by certain underclass individuals in the Black culture, the end result being the embarrassment of the rest of the upstanding Black community.
Here you go Lisa
Oh. I was right, I'm not supposed to use that word ever. Too bad there isn't a racially neutral term for that.
Now what is this 34 up 6 down business? Jesus I am out of touch.
Sorry, I'm only up on the racist comments towards hispanics. I should be more open to racism of all cultures. Damn me.
I copied & pasted from Urban Dictionary. I think that is the rating for the definition. Personally i thought she was referring to MoNiques Racoon coat. I would have been SO embarassed if I asked everyone at the next NAACP meeting how the liked my new coonery when referencing my new fur coat.
Is it possible to be racist within your own race? I kind of feel like that term is racist no matter who says it. It's certainly stereotyping, and it seems to be a pejorative, so now I have to wonder if it's a form of intra-racial racism or if it's a product of social stratification and more elitist than racist. I'm open to all insight on the subject. Sorry if this isn't the place; it just made me wonder.
Lily: It probably is, but as I refer to people as WT, I can't really judge.
I bet it's the same for animals. Cat's hating on other cats, and such.
Lisa: Yeah, I'm not judging it. It was just a philosophical point that struck me. I was thinking about the WT thing when I wrote, too, as I know I'm guilty of that. My view is that the WT thing is elitist, which really isn't any better, but at least people can rise above poverty to avoid my scorn ;)
juju: I wish my cats hated each other. Ever since I brought a kitten home they've been trying to re-establish their hierarchy so half my free time is spent saying things like "Stop humping your brother" or "Do NOT try to hammer him into submission." Why can't they just fight?
Lily: I wasn't saying you were judging. I was saying that I just can't offer a good opinion on it, or one that isn't horribly biased so as to allow me to continue calling people WT.
Cat on cat hate is never the answer fluffykins. And certainly, humping your brother is always the wrong way to handle things.
Wow,thanks guys!
Lisa: I wasn't saying you were saying I was judging the judgments of others. Ow, stroke. :) Now that I think of it, WT can be of any class, so really it's not elitist either. Ahhh, now that I've rid myself of that guilt, bring on Britney.
Ms. Meg, I think you get a special Hags' Choice Award this week.
I won? Little ol' me? You like me Cord; you really like me!!
Congrats to the winners, tho I don't know any of them.
Comment of the week? Wow. Truly honored, Cord. Thanks! This is just so unexpected, I didn't have anything prepared to say….I'd like to thank the writers of Mollygood and her frequent commentators for distracting me from work. Let me move my nobel-schmobel prize into a shoe box so that my 3 commies have room on the shelf. I print them out each time, don't want them to be cluttered or overlap. Merci encore!