The missives contained in Mollygood’s comments sections run the gamut from funny to enlightening to choleric to unreadable, but rarely are they boring and even rarer (thankfully) are they peppered with “OMG she is hottttttttt!” or “z”s in the place of “s”s. Since the swift death of Mollygood, Bad and Poetic, the best of these bon mots have gone relatively unnoticed. The Commies will change all that. Each week, the very best will be highlighted here for greater public consumption and, of course, judgment.
Best mention of one of the best Arrested Development quotes ever: jujubees
serious, I’m afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run
Douchey person with a douchey name: u r teh suck
Cord you are such an asshat. Your snobby comments make you no better than the people you constantly belittle. music snobs suck.
Apparently they’re also giving column space and blog accounts to pretentious d-bags who try to hard to be cool. and people still read and comment - but probably only because mollygood is free.
Good point: Helen Skor
The guy couldn’t help being an ass hole and punching that lady. He’s wearing Jorts. . . obviously he has issues that even heavy medication can’t help cure.
Most disgusting mental image ever: satines_crotch
Maybe not more likely to contract HIV, but possibly more likely to grow stinky mold and half-soggy grey crust–you know, like, in the folds and creases.
Best question of the week: queencrone
I just want to know, how do the Westboro Baptists know who is in hell at the moment? Do they get a copy of the attendance sheet?
Is there a roll call and someone from hell is the informant to the Westboro group?
Most eloquent speech while having a seizure: glrg
THIS IS A FAMLIE OF POOP ALL OF THEM POOOP NOTHING BUT POOP I USE DTO be o fan of the Hulk he was a good ressler BUT NOW ALL OF THEM ARE POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP it is sas they BUT! BROKE HOGAN she should not do sexy in Max MAGAZINE SHE IS NOT THE PRETYIST LOOODS LIKE A MAN BUT uncomftorbal I don not like her teeth. why do they not give the hort boy the money they shuld do it he needs WHY IS THE MOMMA DATING THAT YOUNGE BOY IT IS UNSEAMLY
Winner of the Had Me Giggling For 10 Minutes Straight award: Lale
Wow. First, may I congratulate glrg on such an astute comment. It took me about 15 minutes to decipher, but that’s a moot point. Or should I say, a “moooooot” point. “Unseamly” is now my new favorite word, whether I’m talking about pants that are open at the leg, or overly-tanned cougars.
Editor
Nice.
That is all I have the strength to say.
In response to queencrone- my cousin-in-law had a pretty entertaining phone interview with Shirley Phelps (he's a radio DJ, and she is a scum sucking piece of fuck). It can be heard at http://www.myspace.com/natesmi.....ockthebear
cut and paste because I'm too hellbound to figure out how to poste a link.
I hope that cunt meets a severe undoing.
It's not like some of us were waiting or anything. Now I'm done bitching so let me bask in the glory of the Commies.
well done daughters of mollygood.
God can kill me in the face and send me to hell now since I've managed to score myself at least two handfuls of Commies. It reminds me of back when I was a shorty. That was one of the many comments on AD where kegels were ineffective.
And frankly I nearly shot my wad reading this weeks commies. That's not pooooop either. Poop.
I KNEW that glrg was going to get an auspicious Commie! I have been training myself on grlg this week. I can't speak grlg, but I can comprehend grlg. I feel this is a big step.
Condrats to all!!
glrg is the new ubonics.
Rikers-I went to the link, but my kids have some headphone mess hooked up.
Anyway I had a problem with the audio. When my kids are home from carousing, they can show me how to hear it. Thank you for the link.
Holy shitballs, Batman! I can't believe I won a commie!! I just ran into my roommate's room, screaming "I won a commie! I won a commie!" He now officially thinks I'm out of my tree. Of course, that could have something to do with the fact that we just got home from happy hour and I said, "Ship, guess what? Braaaaaaaah." And blew a big stinker. I'm a lady in every sense of the word.
I love you Helen, that's awesomeness. I'm using that from now on. I'm calling everyone, ship.
Also, "I'm out of my tree, I blew a big stinker." I can use this phrase in so many ways. Thank you Helen Skor!! :-)
hey you r teh suk - it's spelled 'too' when used in the sense of 'trying too hard.'
QC, please be sure to use the sound effects. Braaahhhhhhhhh.
This is further proof that fart jokes never go out of style, which is a good thing for me, because I always seem to have gas. Oops . . . think I just shared too much.
By the way, Ship is my roommates name. And he thinks that girls who "break wind" are not very lady like. Guess it's a good thing I'm not trying to lure him with my feminine wiles.
Congrats to all the winners! I too have won a commie, it was so exciting to me…I showed my husband, if that is not bad enough… my mother. Of course I won my commie for saying that children are like bloodsucking leeches who suck your soul from your skull. Needless to say, no one was all that impressed. I still am proud of my accomplishment and I stand by my statement, although life is so much better since my baby has started going to preschool. She loves it and I get to sleep in :).
Helen-This is what I tell my male roommate: Ladies do not "fart", "break wind" or any other variation of the term. Ladies "fluff". However, I am no lady, and when I have to give it a good one, I affectionately refer to it as "ripping myself a new hole". It's even better if you can catch him sitting down and when he least expects it, dust crop him!
I'm still going to call everyone ship. It sounds better then, bitch, say what?
Crumb - love the crop dusting idea. And if he gets too offended, I will just blame it on my 110 lb. dog.
Juju - have at it!
Yay! I'm going to make a scrapbook with printouts of the precious Commies and Someone Haikus. Is that lame, or do any of you want to share your pre-existing MollyGood scrapbook layouts?
I just have this shrine here with Whitney and Cord's pictures plus a few voodoo dolls. Although there was some serious a holes and hilarious comments I'd love to read again. We need a retrospective Commies.
Dammit. I still only have one commie. Me a retard.
Whatever happened to Someone Haiku? I miss it.
I believe I deserved a Commie….if only as a token gesture…but what would I know? I'm just one man against so many "ladies?". I bet Whitney never rips arse…she's such a good girl.
No Whitney is a lady, therefore she fluffs.
Billy, good luck with the groveling. You have to get pissed off to get a commie. Just ask Ilz.
Lale….I already won five Commies…but I never won one yet for farting….I live in hope….and as clean as Whitney's arse might be…you will never carch me kissing it.
Ooooh, I was mentioned in a commie. I wonder if that is more or less awesome then getting a commie itself.
Poor, Billy. It's like being stuck on the View for eternity. But if you even suggest I'm Sherri Sheppard I'll punch you in the diddy's. But you also forgot about the other males here. They're gonna give you the wet towel treatment in the locker room.
are we in a commie pissing contest? because i've won eleventy billion.
Well I've won 16 cajillion.
Sorry I'm late to the part, congrats to the winners.