Congrats bitches!!!!

I think my fave is James and his use of, "magical negro". You just don't hear that in every day conversation.

i'm kicking myself for having to bail on my half-written comment about the "mystical negro" so i could actually do some work. no matter–it still wasn't nearly as poetic as what james said. good work!

Deimos' packed a punch though. And brevity is the source of wit, but I think Gumbawl wins for me!

I never went back to older posts and (were it not for the Commies ™) missed Gumbawl's. So glad it was highlighted. Because now I know that Government Cheese + monkey vaccinations = being wrong about overpriced, gas guzzling motor vehicles.

I really was on the edge of my seat to see who would be the victor in the battle of Gorilla vs Gorilla. It was as heartwrenching as watching Kramer vs Kramer.

deimos will be very excited!

Congrats to Carleigh, because that is really a congrats to Kitchy's and my nomination for her.

See, even when I'm not a winner, I can still make it all about me.

Congrats on everyone's award, and I am so excited that I got a mention in james's "magical negro" comment. I am so in love with that boy.

*Smooches*

I think we need to work "Mr. Mollygood" into rotation. Or it can be some sort of award that j_b always wins - cause his parts dangle.

I'm sure if you wanted dangly parts you could go see, Dr. Rey.

Yeah, I kind of think james has that one by default. I'm disappointed that we still haven't seen the "Best of the Bests" awards. It seems like Cord would be totally into shining a light onto his awesomeness.

Wait! After 2 kids and almost 40 years I got a pair of dangley parts. It doesn't seem fair.

Dr. Rey: giving you the dangly parts he wishes he didn't have. ™

Lisa, let me just mention once again, how jealous I am of your trademarking abilities. They are truly divine.

Dr Rey's wife removed his dangly parts. At least his Cisco Adlers. True story

oooooohhhhhhh how does Lisa do that?

I'd cut a ho to get that trademark.

If your parts dangle, you're the confederates. If your parts are aesthetically pleasing, you're the yanks, right?

Evil, I love how you work you into it. That's what makes Mollygood Molly-great.

And I think Lisa should have received recognition for her rant against Rachel. Wasn't there some "I am a cunt?" going on? Damn, that deserved something.

James, you precious man. MUAH!

My parts don't dangle, and I'm no Yank. Just sayin'.

What if you have one dangly part and one non dangly part? Or what if you've had your dangly part turned into a pocket?

So Yank my Cord means that Cord is aesthetically pleasing! got it;>

One dangley and 1 not dangley is what was referred to as a hermaphadite but is now called ambiguious genitalia (sp?)

Yeah for the winners! ALthough I love the phrase "magical negro" I am going to have to refrain from trying to work it into a conversation… at least in the office.

Juju: is it sparkly or rufflie? Ruffles = Confederate, sparkles = Yankee.

I loves me some trademarks! Yay ™!

Stupid Duhknees - I was thinking we should ignore her this Thursday. I think it makes her feel good and smart, because she is too dumb to realize she should be embarassed. So we should ignore the ho. Unless we have pent up aggression, then all bets are off.

Great now juju is kicking AND cutting a ho, jsut for a crown? Why the anger juju???

Congrats to all the winners, there were some good ones! And lale I'm with you on the Rachel vs Lisa throwdown, although wasn't it Denise15 that Lisa pwned?

Does she only post on Thursday?

yay! congrats everybody!

I'm angry becuase I never learned to read. I NEVER LEARNED TO READ.

Duhknees only posts Thursday afternoons. We suspect this is when she is bored in study hall. She gets out of "work" at 2:15pm. You know, nothing happens in New York in marketing/PR after 2:15pm.

thank you cord, ladies! this is like the 50th or 51st greatest honor of my life. i share this with all you lovely ladies…and i do encourage the use of the phrase "magical negro"…spread it far and wide. we all must do our part for our country by starting mini racial wars wherever and whenever we can.

i'm cherishing this because after participating in the thread where we all have been calling cord Countess Cordelia Cordessa all day, i doubt we'll ever win one again.

j_b, don't count yourself out yet, son! The Countess ™ is secretly thrilled, like the little pink-dressed pre-teen that he is deep down inside. I bet he skipped a litte.

J_B if you're interested in trademarking that magical negro you might want to talk with Lisa and Dr Rey

Well, Kitchy will be pleased to see she has maintained her winless streak.

I just got a lovely picture in my head. It reminded me of my lovely, Betsy Wetsy.

ha-ha kitchy! i've won 2 commies and i've been here like a day.

i'm pretty sure adequite that magical negro has been in use before so i doubt it's trademarkable.

I doubt they used it with such flair.

I'd like to thank the Academy…

*taking a bow*

Just add an h to magical(h), call it silent, then it's all yours!

Actually, j_b, unlike patenting or copyrighting, you don't have to be the first to use a trademark. The requirement is that the trademark is associated with your product (trademark), service (service mark) or packaging (trade dress). So get on that my little Magical Negro ™.

Kitch! Where've you been all day? A smattering of postings, then you left!

The hottest Christmas Toy this season. Little Magical Negro (insert trademark here)

May I use the term "magical negro"? Is it trademarked? I think I'm in love with it.

thanks lisa. then i can sue cord and mollygood everytime i see one of you using "magical negro". heh, heh, heh!

I take it that MN will be your service mark…?

We'll need a script, posters, tshirt, mugs. And of course some buttons.

Denise shot her wad last week…she (or I doubt anyone else) will never be able to top that. I wonder how body rate thingy is going?

Her wit is lost on the masses. And by masses I mean the 10 people she has detention with.

Be nice you guys, I wonder if her heart 'sploded from all those Red Bull & Ciggy breaks.

Lightweight. Do you think when Britney gets a heart palpatation she quits? No, she goes and gets herself another frapakeeno and double shot of espresso. Then she goes and pumps gas while smoking 3 cigarettes. That's how a real woman does it. Puss.

That's MENTHOL cigs to you juju…and don't forget the BOOTS!!!!

We all know that Duhknees is no Ms. Spears. BritBrit has an otherworldly constitution.

Those boots are an old assistant who refused to get her a vodka/redbull cocktail.

I thought she was all about Coke (a cola) and champagne?

Sigh. I don't like ruffles, either. Nor do I fashion couture out of faded drapery fabric.

Cait, make it work.

Cait: when you mentioned the faded drapery fabric the first thing that came to mind is the Carol Burnette spoof of GWTW. I am now giggling at my desk.

One of the greatest skits, EVER!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjhtxfSMIWk

You're right, BeA. I confuse the two because they are both idiots.

lord has that denise ever had an effect on you girls…

and is something wrong with me that i had to turn of that carol burnett thing after 2 minutes…i love gone with the wind, all 4 hours of it, but?…..i'll watch it when i get home again.

Hence the reference. What, y'all thought I'd reference the ACTUAL Scarlett O'Hara?

Mais non! ;)

Ironically, my mom wants me to wear some big ol' hoop-skirted deal whenever the jhorts-wearer and I get around to tying the knot.

Poufy skirts don't fit through doors, y'all. That's my brightline.

Carol Burnett scared me when I was little. I honestly can't stand her comedy. I do, however, really enjoy Rhett Butler being a good bad boy. That movie never ceases to entertain, no matter how many times I've watched it.

Rhett Butler had Dumbo ears.

Now, Rhett Miller? There's a good southern boy I'd lose my religion over…

I loved me some Carole. I'm old like that. But I can never turn off GWTW. Vivian Leigh was a godess. I threw a nutty when they made a sequel. Blasphemy.

Did you know Scarlett was played by Val's (ex) wife in that sequel? I never saw it. Cait- you knlow what they say about dumbo ears ;-)

Yes, it was after the divorce so I tried to be kind since she was no longer getting his ice man. I even read the book to be fair but it was not even half as good.

She was really hot in Willow, though. Let's be fair. ;)

hmmmm…adequite is right. there was something about rhett, er, clark gable. his goofy ears didn't distract from his brutishness, which is so hot. he was the 1930's version of a gangsta…

james, you have the same problem I do. Hot for old dead movie stars. Rudy Valentino could teach Pete Wentz a thing or twelve about guyliner. If he was still breathing, mind you.

when clark gable as rhett tells scarlett "you should be kissed…and often" and forcibly takes her upstairs, who didn't swoon…so hot. the modern version would probably have george clooney starring in it and he'd tell scarlett how much he respects her as a woman and asks for her permission before he escorts her upstairs where he fumbles with a condom for a full minute before they have boring wasp sex. pfffft!

I can appreciate hotties from all eras, I'm an equal oppty enjoyer I guess. But it does seem like old-school actors/singers/etc had more charm and brains than the ones now…except Bale

Mmmm, Cary Grant.

James just made me wet. Where's my glad wrap?

Who would be Scarlett in the modern version?

j_b I didn't swoon - I was all, oh my god, he is going to rape her. Of course I read the book first so that colored my view of the movie.

I could see a butched up Clooney as Rhett, but for Scarlet…no clue.

The modern version would be Zach Braff and, um, Jessica Simpson. The soundtrack would be provided by Averil Levigne.

Probably some douchey douche like Heidi from the Hills ;-)

ET, valentino was real good looking but too much of a woman for my taste. i like the gable/brando/young erroll flynn (yummy yum yum)/young sean connery roughnecks. and i honestly think brad pitt is the only one who comes close in terms of roughneck potential and looks to these guys (he's not a great actor but who cares…after "fight club" he can do no wrong).

Directed by Baz Luhrmann

Dominique Swain?

ET: for realsie, probably Angelia Jolie. Maybe Natalie Portman - how is she at playing petulant bitch? Or poor man's Natalie, Kiera?

Yeah, it's hard becuase they didn't have botox back in the day. Scarlett would be hard. I'm going to say if Clooney is Rhett than it's time for a Puerto Rican/Mexican/American Indian, Scarlett. I cast myself.

I actually think Brad Pitt is a pretty good actor. He is very smirky, which I love. Reminds of a young Paul Newman. Cat on a Hot Tin Roof–Drunken Liz Taylor can't turn on Paul Newman cuz he's gay and drunk. Good times.

I was watching Thelma and Louise the other day and it struck me how fem Pitt used to be. And I remembered I didn't find him hot until 12 Monkeys. My friend and I agreed Fight Club = Hottest Pitt Encarnation ™.

If Rhett is Bale, then it's high time for me to speak up and represent the Polish-midget-nappy-headed minority as Scarlett! LOOK IT UP!!!

lisa, if we let political correctness get in the way of watching old movies, well, we shouldn't watch old movies. i'm not exactly jumping for joy when prissy and mammy come on the screen but what are you gonna do…the times were rough.

Lisa that's funny you thought he was fem in T&L, I thought he was all man in that movie, and the only time I've thought he was remotely attractive. Maybe cause he was such a smartass jerk in that role.
Ed Norton wasn't bad in Fight Club either :-)

oooh…paul newman. young. forgot about him. those blue, blue eyes in technicolor in "cat on a hot tin roof". and gay…now you got me going…

pitt wasn't fem when he was young…if you look at movies like "a river runs thru it" (and i have many, many times) he's not feminine but he's so fucking pretty it's unreal…so you might mistake it as feminine. as he gets older the prettiness is fading and he's gotten rougher looking, sort of like a pretty boy gone to seed. to me, he's still so fucking beautiful.

So rape is an issue of political correctness? I was just saying that Rhett's hotness was dimineshed for me. Whatever, we all know you BDSM anyways, j_b. ;)

Ed Norton is a chinless wonder to me usually, but fucking HOT in Fight Club and American History X.

I'm pretty sure Natalie Wood was not Puerto Rican but she still rocked in West Side Story. I am pretty oh so pretty.

Yes, I didn't mean he was mincing, but he was too damned pretty. That is exactly the word. I like my men with a little dirt. Great lips though…

by the way, i recommend jennifer aniston as the new scarlett and kathy bates in blackface as mammy. new york of "i love new york" can play prissy. you know an update will be that kind of movie.

I can't wait for the scene where Prissy's mama comes for a visit.

Ha ha ha ha, j_b, you are officialy nominated to cast that movie. Who is playing Ashley?

I think they are already making that movie, and calling it, "Dallas." Stop fucking with my Ewings, Hollywood.

juju, all of my parents' friends used to tell me I looked like a "young Natalie Wood" when I was a teenager. And I'm like, "Really? Did Natalie Wood dress all in black, wear blue mascara with way too much red lipstick and have a fondness for both hair metal and alternative music?"

Spencer from the Hills, seriously that douche is perfect (maybe cause we're supposed to hate Ashley???)

Can I nominate Tom Cruise for Ashley?

You can nominate, but Mr. Mollygood has the final say.

I think Ashley should be Brad Pitt, then he and Clooney can throw "Fuck me" looks at each other like Tom and Val in Top Gun.

Lisa- I know what you mean about a little dirt…seriously never understood the attraction to male strippers/etc…too polished and silly looking for me, honestly. They all look the same after about 1 minute, to me

I like some scruff but don't like the smell of dirty penis.

I call that the John Stamos effect. I could not stand him 20 years ago. Too beautiful. Now that he's aged, he looks a little more manly. Rob Lowe has the same thing.

"I think Ashley should be Brad Pitt, then he and Clooney can throw “Fuck me” looks at each other like Tom and Val in Top Gun."

damn ET…stop turning me on. you think like an oversexed gay man.

ashley should be played by ryan gosling…he even resembles whatsis his face from the original movie in a very weird way.

http://www.petakids.com/feat/k.....osling.jpg

Be Ad: totes. Not that the sex scene isn't hot as hell. He looks the best in T&L when he hadn't shaved.

Ha! juju, is that show not the best thing on tv right now?

can someone tell me why every guy on "smartest model" actually looks like a model but the chicks look like strippers? it must be ben stein's doing…

I agree, james. I am totally hot for the "Soviet" one. Even though I am probably 3 inches taller than he is, and I'm 5'6. I just close my eyes and think of Dolph Lundgren whenever he speaks.

andre! i hate him so much but i really wanna fuck him too…he's such a midget douche. "we are gods and godesses bro! everyone wants to be us!" you just wanna beat him and do him at the same time.

Hate fuck or actual love makin'?

EXACTLY! Like, should I fuck you, or stab you in the chest right now…I can't decide. Maybe I am a gay man in a woman's body?

if it's with a stranger it must be hate fuck. best kind of sex there is…

i gotta go ladies…it's been fun as usual. ET, good luck with the job search…juju, take care of that pouch. lisa, your homework is to watch gone with the wind again til you're turned on by it like evil twin and me ;)

kisses…

Toodles!

Nighty-night, all. I'm off like the Prom Queen's underpants…

I'm Russian and you all are just a bunch of american losers. lol, I'm watching it right now. I loved the other guys comeback, have a goldfish. A few goldfish always calm me the hell down.

What? You don't like the smell of a dirty penis, jujubees?

I still think ET should have won for her GAL/Drunken Blogging Mel Gibson analogy.

Hooray, being Irish and Cherokee - I can drink you hags under the table! ;)

As for rough-and-ready, James, my love, have you forgotten Bond? That saucy minx Craig (not the senator) is a hot piece.

Oh…and…

BALE!

i did mention the old bond mr. connery…shame on me for forgetting the new, beautifully thuggish, brutish, bond mr. craig. man he makes me wet.