Baby looks concerned. As I would be, since… you know, nothing against her… but it’s Amanda Peet. Why are the paps up in her face like she’s Lindsay Lohan?

Speaking of Lohan, does anyone else keep mentally referring to her rehab as Cirque de Sol-odge? Because I sure do.

What perfect little eyebrows that baby has.

Is it too early to start whitening her teeth?

That is one precious baby. “Butterball” haha.

You’re right, Janice.

Also, there’s something wrong with this picture. Peet’s got both hands on the baby. Where’s her drink??

It’s in the baby’s bottle, it’s a Jack and Pepsi.

I don’t know… maybe she forgot it in the gas station restroom? What a negligent mom.

That baby isn’t even smoking.

LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hehheh

You bitches are soooo funny!!!!!

babies melt my black heart. true story. i wonder if the baby would bum me a smoke.

Concerned is the perfect description for that baby’s face. You’re so right, Courtney.

Cooter, I lover your name. Were you a big fan of The Andy Griffith show?

ehhhh I get the feeling cooter is a big fan of something entirely different

Nobody ever gives Cooter the respect he deserves.

I’ve seen more Andy Griffith than I care to admit, but even among Floyd, Goober, Gomer, and (my favorite) Howard, I don’t remember a Cooter.

Lord. The shit you used to be able to get away with calling people on TV. I know we’ve talked about it before but it bears repeating that there was a character named Boner of Growing Pains.

*on

I traded my hook hand for a sponge hand, and it’s making kitchen cleanup a breeze but it’s even worse on my typing.

I had a friend who actually met Boner. Apparently that wasn’t even his real name. Whatev. At least he was cool about being called, Boner. Unlike some unfunny douche’s. (I’m looking at you Chachi).

Cooter was on Dukes of Hazzard, you assholes.

I had a crush on Boner. The TV guy. I guess it’s in keeping with my hearting Gopher and Radar, not to mention Barry Manilow. Yes, I have a type and it’s not pretty.

I know who Boner is. Growing Pains.

Are there people who don’t love Barry Manilow?

I cannot stand Amanda Pete.
Ew.

Boner. LOL!

Cooter! Rosco Pico Train! Boss Hog!

What about MONROE? “Too Close For Comfort”?

Or SCHNEIDER!

such great characters

To all of those concerned with my name, we had a stray cat that we took in and at the time my 3yr old neice called her vajayjay cooter so with thought that fit for the cat. The cat stuck around and it became a tad embarrasing calling for cooter in the yard.

also my husband ran over Cooter…true story!

FU don’t pour your haterade on me. You Cooter lovers are all alike. Cootaloonies.

Juju said she loved your name, how is that concern?

Your 3-year-old is a trendsetter. She either came up with va-jay-jay years before Oprah and Gray’s or your cat was recently found and quickly run over.

LOL@Cooter, I need a second to catch my breath. I had a cat named peanuts. It was always humiliating when she’d get out and I’d have to yell, peaaaaanuts. It’s really hard to properly annunciate the t when your yelling.

“Come here, little cooter! Come to momma!”
Priceless.

Sorry bitches didnt really mean “concern” I should of said interested. I’m a little high!

Noted fashion photographer Nigel Barker, my cooter got out. Can you help me find it?

My cooter’s always getting lost over in the neighbor’s yard. He’s nice though, so he grabs it for me and brings it home.

Why do I keep hearing Slingblade’s voice growling “Coooooooooter”?

My cooter had fleas so I shaved it bald.

Some people call it a pussy, I call it a cooter, uh-huh.

My cooter lies over the ocean. My cooter lies over the sea. My cooter lies over the ocean, oh bring back my cooter to me.

Bring back, bring back, oh bring back my cooter to me. TO ME!

lol @ juju
Bwwwwwwwwwwwaaaaaahahaha

Oh the tears I have running down my face right now.Lol.

I am going to be so pissed at myself in about 10 minutes when I can’t stop singing that song in my head.

Me too! I’m laughing like a maniac, all alone.

My cooter lies over the ocean…
haaaaaaaaa!

People let me tell you ’bout my cooter she’s so much fun

Whether we’re talkin’ cooter to cooter
Cause it’s my best friend.
Yes cooters my best friend.
(scat finish).

I love a good scat finish.

scoobiedoo-wap-badow!
Cooterscoot-bippity-do-waaa-cootascat!

juju-just got the peanut thing - sounds like penis. I had to sit here saying peaaanuts outloud!

A good scat finish on a cooter song brings a whole new meaning to “Scat, pussy!”

It took some guy yelling back at me, you offering, for me to get it too.

I feel like adding scat makes me a true artists. MTV better not ignore my genius or I’m going to act like a little bitch and cry about it every chance I get.

If you don’t win, it’s obviously a manifestation of MTV’s discrimination against candies. I’ll boycott their asses for that.

Last time I was at there award show they wanted to know how many people I brought. I was all, FU Biatches. They should be grateful I even showed up.

*Their* you know what I meant. I’ll box block you.

Juju, I worry that you’ve started hitting the narcotics even though you’re still two weeks pre-surgery.

It’s okay, I’m already wearing Tom Ford.
I hate when bitches get all up in my entourage’s face wanting to know how many of us there are. It’s like, “Simmer down, bitch, and let the wave of my presence wash over you,” you know?

Janice, that was entirely too well-spoken to be bad-ass.

Simmah down, biatch. Ledda wave a-my personal-ty wash o’r you, biatch.

You’re right. I need practice.

Dis ma posse! Y’all best rehcugniiize! V. I. P.! Unnnnnh!!

Too far in the other direction?

No, it only took me two read-throughs to figure out, so I think you’re doing damn good.

Sweeeet. I say, like, yo brain. Dis is Friday. You go now, or I kill you with Jack Danyuls. Bah. I kill you with Jack even if you go.

All I can say to that is…

F U!

I like it. Let’s take dis posse on the road an get all up in der grillz. LES DEUX!

Kitchy, I thought I would be proactive and start taking my pills before the pain starts. That’s how Sean Preston would do it.

Janice better check herself before she wrecks herself.

So we’ve gone from WWJD to WWETP to HWSPHP?

That would be How Would Sean Preston Handle Pain, by the way.

I would check myself, but Bobby Trendy stole my mirror. Bad Bobby.

Pity Bobby has no intention of USING the stolen mirror.

It was too late. He wrecked himself. Janice is sooooo last Tuesday. Friday is all about Sean Preston and his pain management. He doesn’t do holistic.

Well that’s because he didn’t get enough breastmilk. Britney couldn’t have produced it very long since she got pregnant with Jayden so quickly. You can’t produce breastmilk while you’re pregnant.

He’s going to grow up all bitter at boobies.

And cooteres.

I am last Tuesday? Does that mean 3 more days of work?? Oh the humanity!!!!!!

Yes, cooteres. They’re the hoity toity high-class French version of cooters.

I can tell by there pretentious accent.

Janice is stuck in Tuesday forever.

Like Groundhog Day.
I go kill self now. It’s okay, I was feeling flat-chested anyway.

I’ll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.

I’m offended!Humph!

I’ll give you the hamburger when I hit Friday.

There, there, don’t cry, dry your cooter now.

A dry cooter is a bad sign.

Hush little cooter, don’t say a word, momma’s gonna buy you a mockingbird

Well, a leaky one isn’t good either. Cinch it.

Don’t cry for me, cooterina
The truth is, I never left you
Not through my wild days
My mad existence
I kept my promise
Don’t keep your distance

Unless you’re leaking.

It’s cooter karaoke day here on Mollygood.com.

Near far wherever you are
I believe that the cooter does go on
Once more you open the door
And you’re here in my cooter
And my cooter will go on and on

Like a cooter
Touched for the very first time
Like a coo-ooo-oooter
When your heart beats
Next to mine

I am cooter
Hear me roar
In numbers too big too ignore…

stop Kitchy you’re killing me!

It must have been cooter,
But it’s over now…
It must have been cooter,
But I lost it somehow

I’m bringing cooter back
Them other cooters don’t know
how to act!(Yeah)
I think you’re special
what’s behind your
cooter.(Yeah)

I gotta go….my husbands peanuts needs me.

Cooter ate all my boyfriend’s peanuts.

Dirty slut.

Cooter’s a peanut whore.

I know! Bad pussy. Stay away from the peanuts.

Holy cooteronomy, Batman! Apparently I’ve stumbled into the 2007 Inaugural Cooterfest.

I’m in the running for Assistant Cooter.

Isn’t Cooteronomy part of the Old Testament?

Oh. Deuteronomy. My mistake.

You want answers?

I want the cooter!

YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE COOTER!

It’s part of the book of Mormon. Or maybe that was the Dead Sea Scrolls. Eeeew. Ancient cooter.

If everybody jumped off a cooter, would you?

All right, cooters. I’m outa here for the weekend!

Have a great cooter!!

I heard they unearthed the ancient cooter in a cave. It was musty, but still otherwise intact.

Cootaloo, Kitchy!

New event at our state fair, cooter wrestling!

I love fried cooter on a stick.

Cooters keep getting into the mulch out back and making a mess out of it.

How bout cooter by the foot! Nothing like a nice cold cooter on a hot day!

I’m crying laughing. I’m doubled over my keyboard and my chin is hitting random keys.

Cootere, by Tom Ford, the eau de toilette.

My cooter knows no bounds.